I Prefer To Dress My Son As A GirlMy son Curtis is a frail skinny little thing with thin delicate features and straight fine shoulder length blonde hair. He's never been a rough and tumble sort of boy, he prefers playing pretend games and he likes drawing and doing other kinds of art projects and he likes cooking with me and helping me with the chores around the house. He doesn't like things to be messy and actually enjoys cleaning up and "making things neat" as he puts it. His room is always very orderly. He has a very sweet and delicate way about him and isn't into wrestling or playing "Army men" or "Cops and Robbers" or other traditionally boyish games like this. And though he likes his little toy cars and his Lego's he also has a thing for horses and has a collection of toy horses and My Little Pony toys. He also has some Groovy Girl dolls that he likes playing with and though he doesn't officially have a dollhouse he does have this really cool wooden tree house that was made in Switzerland that I bought for him for Christmas a few years ago and he has an assortment of little wooden people, animals, and furniture that go along with the tree house. There's even little wooden plants and a toy planter boxes with holes for the plants to go in so he can pretend the little people have their own organic garden. It's so sweet to watch him play with his little wooden people and make up these elaborate stories about what they're doing. Unfortunately when other boys have been over to play they criticize his toys and tease him for playing with "girls toys" so he brings out his Lego's and hos toy cars but I can see that he's disappointed that other boys won't play with his tree house or his My Little Pony toys. But when girls come over to play he's right at home with them and they play with his My Little Pony toys and they play with his Groovy Girl dolls and with the tree house and all the little wooden people and he's happiest little boy in the world because the girls don't criticize him and make fun of him for his choices in what toys he likes.
I've always encouraged him to be himself, to embrace his natural demeanor and personality, I've never tried to make him into more of a boy and when he's asked for toys like Groovy Girl dolls and My Little Pony horses I've bought them for him without question because I really don't see anything wrong with a boy playing with these kinds of toys.
So about a year ago when Curtis had just turned six (he's seven now) we went to visit a friend of mine with two daughters about Curtis' age who had just recently become a single mother due to a divorce with her deadbeat husband. We visited for one week and Curtis was perfectly happy and comfortable having two girls to play with. On the second day we were there the girls dressed him as a princess and I could not believe how adorable he was in that pink little princess dress! He had the cutest shy little smile on his face as he and the girls came out to show off his 'new outfit'. The girls were also dressed and princesses and I didn't break out in laughter or ask why he was wearing a dress I took him in my arms and gave him hugs and kisses and told him that he looked absolutely precious and adorable and he giggled and laughed and twirled about the living room with the girls and I could see in his eyes how much he was enjoying being in that adorable little princess dress.
The girls brought him outside and three of them went dancing twirling and running all over the front and back yards of the house and Curtis was perfectly happy to be running around outside in a dress. When it came time for lunch we called the kids inside and he was also perfectly happy sitting at the table and eating lunch in the pink princess dress. After lunch the kids played inside for a while in the girls' bedroom and when I checked on them I saw that they were playing with Barbie Dolls and Curtis was very happy sitting there on the floor in a pink princess dress playing with Barbie's so I let him be and didn't say anything. The truth was I found that I really enjoyed seeing my little boy in a cute little dress playing with Barbie Dolls!
By four in the afternoon the kids were in the TV room watching Sponge Bob and all three of them were still in the princess dresses and the dresses stayed on until after dinner when it was time for baths and getting ready for bed. I put Curtis into his regular boy pajamas and asked him if he had a good day and he got a dreamy sort of smile on his face and said that he had more fun than ever. I hugged and kissed him and then read a book to the him and the girls and soon after they were all asleep and when I went to bed that night I thought about how much I enjoyed seeing Curtis being so happy in a pink princess dress.
The next day we had plans to take the kids to a children's museum and to have a picnic at a park near the museum and after breakfast as we were getting the kids dressed I had what I guess could consider to be a bit of a wicked thought. I wanted to see my little boy going around happily dressed as a girl! I'm not sure why other than the fact that he really had fun the day before being a princess all day and I wanted him to be happy and I just couldn't get over how adorable he looked in that dress. It just seemed to fit his personality so well and with his long straight fine blonde hair and his delicate thin features he looked more like a girl than a boy already but especially when he was running around in a pink dress. So as I helped Curtis out of his pajamas I said to him, "You know Curtis, it's a really hot day out today. I think that you'd be much more comfortably of you wore a dress today instead of your pants and t-shirt."
Curtis gave me an inquiring look and I glanced over at my friend and she gave me a surprised sort of smile shrugged her shoulders and said, "Why not? I'm sure the girls won't mind lending a dress to him for the day."
The girls thought this was a great idea and they started taking dresses out of their closet that he could wear and soon Curtis was overwhelmed with choices of dresses that he could wear but before he tried any of them on I said that he needed to have appropriate underwear if he was going to wear a dress and I took his Spider-man underpants off of him and looked in the girls’ underwear drawer for some panties. Curtis is such a sweet and innocent little boy that he didn't really care that the girls were seeing him naked, he just stood there and waited for me to get him some underwear and I just couldn't help myself, I chose a pair of bright pink panties that had a little white bow in the front and I held them up and said, "I think these will be nice for you" and I helped Curtis put them on and we all noticed how he ran his hands all over the panties and touched the little bow with his thin finger.
Next he tried on several dresses and he really loved twirling about the room in them and looking at himself in the mirror and after about forty five minutes of trying different dresses on he settled on a cute little sundress that had pastel stripes in plaid patterns all over it and tied in bows at the shoulders with thin straps and had a sash sewn into the middle that tied into a bow in the back. He danced and twirled about and admired himself in the mirror and then I put a pink barrette in his hair and he looked at himself in the full length mirror and held the dresses skirt out and turned around a few times seeing how he looked from all angles and his eyes were sparkling the entire time. He finally said, "Wow, I really look like a girl mommy! This is fun! I like being a girl!" We all cheered when he said this and then we finished getting ourselves ready and soon we were out the door and into my friend’s car and on our way to the Children's museum.
Curtis was in heaven all day long. He was so natural and comfortable in the dress and as far as I could tell no one at the museum suspected anything. He looked like a girl and people just assumed that he was a girl although a few people did overhear one of us call him Curtis a few times and I noticed some funny looks when this happened but we just carried on like all was normal and we all had a wonderful time at the museum. Afterwards we had out picnic in the park and Curtis and the girl's ran around and played on the playground for a couple of hours. Afterwards we went for ice cream and then eventually headed back to my friend’s house. Once we were back home the girls changed their clothes and Curtis changed into a pretty pink blouse and a light purple terry cloth skirt and he exclaimed very loudly that girl's clothes were so much better than boys clothes.
That night I put Curtis into a nightgown and he was absolutely thrilled with it. The next day he expected to dress like a girl again so I had him choose the dress and panties on his own and he chose white panties that had pink hearts printed on them and sparkling trim on the waistband and a pink sundress. We went into town and did some shopping and went to see a movie and again went to a park where the children played together and at one point I saw some boys gathered around Curtis and the girls and I was wondering what it was all about and then Curtis and the girls came running over to us and Sarah,, the older girl (She was eight at this time) said, "People know Curtis is a boy because of his name and those boys over there started to tease him for being a sissy"
We all talked about it and Curtis suggested that we call him Courtney instead so it was decided. So long as Curtis was dressed as a girl we would call him Courtney. It took a little getting used to for all of us including Curtis who didn't even respond to the name Courtney a few times until he was nudged and then he remembered and he laughed about it.
Curtis refused to wear boy clothes for the rest of the visit and spent all his time being dressed as a girl and he was very excited about it. When it was time for us to leave he couldn't stop saying how much of a wonderful time he had but when it came time for him to put boy clothes back on he became really sad. He didn't want to go back to being a boy and the girl's rushed off to their bedroom and came back a few minutes later with two dresses that they said they hardly ever wore and of it was OK with their mother they would like to give them to 'Courtney' as a gift. Their mother smiled and said it was fine and Curtis hugged all them in turn and thanked them profusely. I helped him out of the nightgown he was wearing and into one of the dresses and after more hugs and kisses and goodbyes we got into our car and drove home.
Curtis wanted to wear the dress to bed that night but I wouldn't let him. Instead I gave him a long t-shirt and told him to pretend that it was a nightgown. He wasn't quite so happy with this choice but he was tired and accepted it and went to bed and the next day I put him into the other dress that the girls had given him and brought him to Target and he and I had the time of our lives shopping in the girls section for an entire new wardrobe for my little boy! he was the happiest child on the face of the planet that morning and I spent over two hundred dollars on new girl’s clothing for him - several dresses and skirts, blouses, four packages of girl's panties, a collection of tights, five different nightgowns and I even bought him a pink leotard and a girl's one-piece pink bathing suit with Barbie printed across the front in sparkling letters! We had quite a fashion show that afternoon!
I packed all of Curtis' boy clothes into a suitcase and put it on a corner of his closet and we filled his closet with his new girl clothes and now, more than a year later, Curtis is seven and a half years old and he dresses like a girl all the time. He won't go back to wearing boys clothing. I now there will be issues to deal with as he gets older but for now he is the happiest little boy ever. He decided to keep his name as Curtis because he's not ashamed of being a "boy/girl" as he has coined himself to be and I have him enrolled in a small private school that accepts him as a "girl/boy" and supports his choice in being feminine. The school already had two Tomboys attending - two girls with short boy's haircuts who always dress like boys and prefer to play boys games - one would never know they were girls - and the school embraced the idea of having a boy who prefers dressing and presenting as a girl for the contrast it would create in the classroom and for furthering the teaching of tolerance and acceptance to the other children in the school. Curtis is now best friends with both boys and girls at his school and he is so incredibly happy to be living as a girl even though he has the body of a boy. We've watched the videos together on youtube about transgendered children and he's decided that he must also be transgendered and he's happy that he's not alone.
So that's my story. My "Confession". I chose to put my little boy in girl's clothing because I enjoyed seeing him dressed this way and by doing so I believe that I helped him to discover his true inner nature. Maybe some of the readers here will think I'm a bad mother for telling my son that fateful day that I thought he'd be happier wearing a dress but I believe that I did the right thing, that he's much happier as a girl than he was a boy.
I was looking for somewhere to share this story for my own therapy, to just tell it and put it out there that once I saw my son dressed as a girl I wanted him to stay that way and as it turned out, he prefers it himself, if he didn't like wearing dresses and being like a girl then there’s no way I would of forced it on him but when I saw how happy he was in that pink princess dress I wanted to provide him the opportunity to indulge in feminine clothing, after all he already had always been more feminine than masculine and when he embraced the chance to be like a girl I couldn't help but encourage it so when I came across Experience Project and saw what people are doing here, sharing their stories about their lives I decided to share the story of me and my little boy/girl. If you’re so inspired then please feel free to let me know what you think, even if it’s negative, I can take it because I’m 100% convinced what I did the right thing by my little boy but I’m curious to know how others will react.