Of Course I'm Ok

Of course I'm ok. What could possibly b wrong? I'm married to my high school sweetheart we have 4 beautiful boys together. I live close to the majority of my family. I have a good job

But he got laid off 2 years ago. And we struggle to make bills. And the longer he's off the moodier he is. He goes to college now. Seems to like the school and classes. But he's mean at home. Yelling at the kids all the time. Yelling at me. He doesn't help with the housework unless I've bitched at him for a couple weeks then hell help but he complains the entire time making it harder to get done and I wish I had just done it myself. He hardly ever smiles never says anythIng nice to anyone anymore. And when I ask him what's wrong he says everything. When I ask why he's in a bad mood he yells at me and tells me it's my perception. He says he's fine. I recommend seeing a doctor and he yells at me

Dads health is getting worse and because we live close it falls to me to check on him take his blood pressure ensure he takes his meds. Check his legs and feet for new cuts and sores

And my really good job is a nurse on a lock psychiatric ward where it's not uncommon to become some ones punching bag. I'm called a b*tch and wh*re almost daily. These people r mean.

And then I go game to an unhappy yelling husband a preteen who is starting puberty a 9 year old with an explosive anger disorder that I think he gets from his father a 3 year old who is testing boundaries and a 2 year old who is one of the fussiest children I have ever meant.

Now for the good stuff we hardly ever have sex not because we don't want to but because if he has to put any work in its not worth it to him. Out of 4 kids shouldn't one be the daughter I have longed for for almost 12 years? I can't change jobs due to him being in school and we can't have a lapse in pay or insurance.

I'm not sure I love him. I think I married him because I was 16 and pregnant and scared. No that's not right of course I love him but I don't know if I'm in love with him.
astonehocker astonehocker
1 Response May 5, 2012

last resort record him secretly to back up your claims that he is being mean etc if that does not change him nothing will maybe you need to take a break from each other he could stay with a friend for a week or 2 and see how it goes afterwards if its the same then you 2 need to go your separate ways