Why Pretend I Am Okay When I Am Not At All

I don't know why I act like everything in my life is just fine when it is no where near okay.

The truth is my life is so messed up anymore I don't know what I actually believe anylonger. My adoptive family has lied to me and is still lieing to me and keeping thing from me I need to know and its hurting me more than they know.

Anymore I don't know that I am even here really. Everything seems far off from me. Voices seem really distant sometimes I don't even know if someone said something they are so distant. Even my own voice seems distant.

I don't know who I can trust of the people I used to trust in my life. I have been so hurt that I am unsure of anything anymore.

kthimm1 kthimm1
18-21, F
3 Responses Feb 21, 2009

same here... but no matter how thin that thread is, you still gotta hold on.

I cant really anymore.I am holding on by a thread anymore.

i feel that, as well... but hey, sometimes, or, well, it seems like the whole time, we have to be strong. not for them, but for ourselves.<br />
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it just happens at times. people can't really handle our pain...