I Think I May Be Mentally Ill...please Help
I've never told this to anyone. Not even to the closest people in my life nor do I think I ever will. This is probably the closest I think I could openly admit this to anyone. I do pretend I'm someone else. All the time. I've been doing it since I was a very small child. I think it started out as just playing by myself alone with my toys and having an imagination but now its full blown and I sincerely believe I may have a personality disorder. I pretend I am other people. Mostly, people that are celebrities or are public personas. I take on their personalities and even accents if they have one. I try not to but some times I'll slip up and let an accent out. I'll go to work every day and pretend I'm that person, male or female. When I come home, its even worse. Because I'm alone I'll pretend to be two people at once, talking back and forth effortlessly in conversation. It seems to help me not be lonely like I'm in a relationship but at the same time helps me to avoid relationships with the opposite sex because I'm afraid of losing it. I also can't watch a movie anymore without acting out film out loud as someone else, playing all parts. I'll do the same with sports matches. I've tried to hint to my mother that I may be schizophrenic or worse but have never told her any of this because I'm afraid to disappoint her. I'm scared and I want to stop. I'm thinking about contacting a local metal illness clinic and having myself tested. What should I do?