I Just Dont Know Why

i scare myself sometimes.

i dont seem to know how to tell the truth about myself. i feel like it wouldnt be enough for some people. and yes i know that if people dont like me for me, that shouldnt make me be someone else. but its like ive become addicted to lying to people about who i am. i dont even know how to stop because it just comes natuarally now. i think it might be my tendency to make people happy, no matter what i have to do for it. and if someone doesnt like me the way i am, i change for them so then they can be happy for me.

so far, its really screwed me over.

bells19 bells19
18-21, F
4 Responses Dec 4, 2008

First off. You sound like a Virgo. haha. And Don't worry. I'm not going to tell you how much of a idiot you are or how pathetic you are but i am going to give you a little insight on what your actions can lead up to. I'm not going to go into my own experience much but i was on the other end for a couple years. It affected me greatly and not in a positive way. Anyway, I can't express this enough to people who lie a lot - you are not only hurting other people here and you have to know this. People get so caught up in lying that they eventually don't know what's real anymore, you know? It's heartbreaking to me - You guys build this world to escape to but you can never...fully live It. In fact, some people put their life totally on pause to play into this false reality. One day - It's not going to be enough for you anymore.

You guys are idiots and dont realize how much you hurt others w/ your lies or just dont care!<br />
read my story and get some perspective from the other side.<br />

doesn't exist any more

yeah i do that kind of stuff too.<br />
a few years ago i told people i had this friend and i made up a bunch of things about him and had them conviced he was real and then i told everyone he died just for the attention.<br />
i dont even know why i do it.

I know this will sound as though I am "pretending" but I totally do that too. I have even invented a step-brother that doesn't exist. I do have a step-mom but no brother. I have even killed him off a few times to get out of some stuff. I say I used to live in texas and in actual reality I've never been there. <br />
that is the honest thruth