Walking On Egg Shells

Back from college for the christmas holiday. Everyone is happy, depressed, exited, hungry, tired, or broke.
Me on the other hand is all of these things. Im happy i passed and i get to see my family. Exited for the food I'm about to eat and the presents i will receive/give. Im broke from the holidays and depressed as well; but i feel like I'm going to be walking on egg shells the next couple of days.
The reason is because College has changed me so. Im not afraid to speak my mind anymore. I feel like I may let my frustrations out on some poor innocent person or charge at my cousin because I have never actually exploited my feelings toward him. I have forgiven him, but i haven't expressed my feelings.
Im tired of this fake smile and I'm tired of being angry and having to smile. I feel so timid and just stressed because i have not let loose. I feel like even the simplest thing could spark my anger. I've never actually been truly mad or told someone off, I just feel like I wouldnt have a problem expressing myself anymore.
I dont want to ruin anyone's Christmas i want it to be a lovely time of the year, but i guess i have to get over this bridge for me to be truly happy; but we shall see.
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26-30
Dec 12, 2012