That's It For Me!

Yesterday I got up and walked a mile to get the final portion of my sons papers filled out for him to get into job corps. He was asleep after being on the computer for 16 hours!  I talked to the recruiter and he told me that my son could leave in as little as a week because he has a clean record.  I'm all glad and everything thinking that it's good news and I tell my son what was said and he asks me if his Aunt had called.  I had asked her if he could stay with her when I had no other route and she said MAYBE. I took that as no and started with the Job Corps.  So anyway I said to him would you rather get into job corps and be independent and take care of yourself or, go live with someone else and be dependent on them?  This young man said, and I quote, "I have been dependent on people for so long that I am used to it". Unquote.  I had to walk away from that one.  I can't deal with that kind of limited mentality!  He is so much like my daughter that I call them twins!  Always making bad choices, NEVER listening to me or following my good advice, and always coming back to me pulling on my apron strings to get them out of the messes that they create!  I can't deal with it anymore!  I told him that he should go to job corps and NOT take from his Aunt and besides it's not guaranteed so he can't rely on it and of course he got an attitude and said if I hadn't brought of the idea he wouldn't want to go!  I'm trying to keep him from living in the streets and he blames ME because he doesn't want to listen to me and go to job corps.  Isn't that unbelievable? Finally I lost patience and I told him that's it.  You do what you want to do it's your decision.  If you go to CA and live off of your Aunt when you have a chance to take care of yourself then that's your business and I do not want to discuss it anymore.  That's when he started ranting that he doesn't want to go to CA that he wants to do job corps.  I can't care anymore.  All I know is if he goes there and something happens and he has to leave he will not come back to my home!  Should he choose job corps and he messes up on purpose and gets sent back here he'll have to find someone else to take him in.  I'm finished playing rescue ranger for these hard headed, ungrateful, selfish, supposed to be adults.  It's ridiculous! 
Comprehensive2 Comprehensive2
1 Response Jul 12, 2007

I'm afraid that dependant child forever attitude has reached epidemic proportions. Of all of the fellas my age and younger, and most of the ladies- no idea how to take care of themselves. <br />
Though in some of the worst cases I know of - it's usually a single mother who has no intention of pushing them out of the nest.<br />
For myself I have two girls, one thing that I have impressed upon them (and continue to do so) is that my job is to make them independant of me. I know they will inevitably make mistakes, however if they learn how to make good choices, the rest takes care of itself.<br />
My girls will either go out into the world at 18 or onto college, then out into the real world, I've made this very clear. It's my job.