I Have Ptsd

I don't know where to began. I served for twelve years and stopped when I met my wife. Now she wants to divorce me. We have been married for five years. She is done dealing with my PTSD. She isn't seeking help or advise. She told me that she doesn't know what to do anymore. I'm seeking counseling myself to try to manage PTSD and some of its issues like anger. All I want is my wife and our family together. I'm fighting for her in every way I can. She is just done! She told me that it is her at this point. There are other things she is doing that hurts and is hurting our marriage. I know I'm strong but, this is killing me! I do cry. I have read some of post from woman who are married and seeking help or advice and I applaud you. I wish my wife would do something. The job I did for our country doesn't give me benefits I need so I'm doing this myself. I think if I could read between the line of my wife, I don't think I would be in this situation. Those of us with PTSD, I see the love from our loved ones leave. It's easy thing to do, but not from us. We are stuck and feel unwanted. I wish with a click of fingers that I could be rid of PTSD! Is there anyone who would like to talk and or help each other?
Mike7910 Mike7910
36-40, M
2 Responses Dec 24, 2012

Im not married to my marine guy. we only been dating for a month and half. He already start to withdrawal from me and makes it hard for me to understand him. im willing to fight for him and make it work. i know he has been through alot and willing to be there for him. Just that he doesnt comunicate well with me.

I have been married to a former navy man with PTSD for 18 yrs. It has been anything but an easy road. He was married previously, but it didn't show up until after hurricane Hugo in 1989. The trauma from the devastation caused the ptsd to come out and it came out full blast. She couldn't deal. He had been in and out of VA hospitals and under treatment for several years. When we met, I got him involved with the Disabled American Veterans. They were able to get him his service connected disability and medical help. As such, it also allowed me to attend his dr appointments with him and I was taught how to help him through episodes. There are different types and stages of PTSD and there is no simple answer of how to treat it. A lot of it is trial and error. Meds help for a while and have to be changed frequently. Not only do you see your psych, but you also see a social worker who is utmost in helping in the day to day problems of this terrible affliction. If you have children, they also need to learn about it and how to deal not only with you but also with themselves. It is a FAMILY issue. You can all make it if you work together. But YOU must also trust your wife to help you through it. She might not totally understand what you are feeling, but she is going through her own type of PTSD with you. It isn't easy for her either. She needs someone she can vent to and can help her through the tuff times. Someone other than family and who understands this disease. Sometimes the VA has support groups for PTSD. Ask at your local VA or the DAV. From what you are saying you qualify to become a DAV member and then she can become a member of the DAV auxiliary. I am a Past State Commander of the DAV Auxiliary of Florida.
The auxiliary can help her a lot in getting the support she needs. This marriage can be saved.....BUT.....you both have a lot of work to do and you both need to stop feeling sorry for yourselves and start getting the help you need.