I Wish I Didnt...

but I do. And it doesnt take much anymore. As soon as I feel threatened, ....ashamed.... embarrassed...hurt.....I put up a wall. Its a defense mechanism I guess...

and I use sarcasm to decorate my wall. I hang pictures of him...of you...of her...all my pains on their individual walls. I will be the first one to laugh at myself and put it in a frame and hang it on the walls.

I have doors.

I have so many skeletons that claw at the closed doors of my heart. They claw till their boney fingers bleed as though living. They whisper. They cry. They laugh. 

They scream....but only at night when Im asleep.

And I hate those doors more than the walls. Because when a door opens, and gets slammed...whatever I had inside becomes a ghost...and just another skeleton to haunt me.

I build my walls in front of those doors. Just more protection.

Because those ***** at ADT wont install a system inside my heart. 
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2 Responses Dec 5, 2012

I think you are scared of emotion - scared of what could be. Would you agree that with all these doors and keys and walls, it's just shielding you from being you? In my opinion, if we were to meet (in a dark alley of course :P), who would I meet? The opinionated version of you or the reserved/withholding Punk1n?

Curious minds want to know. I don't know at all, but what I do know is that you are passionate and to me, passion trumps all.

Decisions sweet decisions

Before you know it all those wall make a fine prison.

Sometimes that is the most important thing.