Is Enough Really Enough?

I've been smoking sticky icky for the passed 5 years,I'm only 19. It all started in my friend's garage, we would smoke out of a watering can that we crafted into a bong. Anyway, sophmore year of highschool, our house was forclosed on and we were forced to move. We used to live in the middle of nowhere an so when we moved into the city, I was really intimidated by such a change (big city, big school,no friends) that I turned to what used to remind me of the good ol days, pot. I made a few "friends" who were into the same stuff I was, including pot, I was still a light smoker and they were heavy smokers, we would meet up before school only to get blasted, we would meet up during school to smoke, and the rest of the day was spent driving drug dealers around town in Exchange for free weed. That said, I don't remember much of my highschool experience at all. Now my "friends" have quit smoking and I'm still heavily addicted.

Today I ran out of weed and after 6 hours of trying to figure out how I was going to get my next fix, I finally said enough is enough, im tired of feeling like weed is necesity and needs to be part of my budget ($20 a gram / 3 grams a day), I'm tired of feeling like I can't go to sleep or wake up without smoking pot. I'm tired of feeling like everything I do needs to have a smoke session jammed in. I'm sick of my little brother and sister telling me my room smells like a skunks *** (sibling relationships have changed also). all my emotions, feelings and thoughts have changed so much that im not sure who I am or what I like to do when I'm not high.

I still love everything about pot, the look, the smell, the taste....awesome. but I'm finally starting to see that in the end, weed really just isn't going to fix anything, and for this, I say enough is enough.
need4sobriety need4sobriety
18-21, M
2 Responses Jan 29, 2012

It's hard I know I know where mine is n I'm trying to fight the urge to go smoke some.......but I'll keep trying...I find it especially hard to not smoke more one t 2 nights after I smoked before it's just so hard...n it's not just the high I need but the adrenaline of not wanting to get caught.....good luck to u...hope I can hold off too

Good for u for getting to this point of considering quitting. I'm in the same boat. Had a sleepless night last night and expect the same today. Try keeping busy and tiring yourself out. Maybe exercising. Good luck with it