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I Am to Young to Die!

I am a 53 year old single dad of a 16 year old girl in the end game stage of emphysema and COPD, if I am part of the 50 % I can live another 5 years, at this stage even the comon cold can take my life! As young as I am there is so much I can not do and so much I will never be able to do, but what I can do I will enjoy to the fullest with what ever I have left! My last battle for breath lasted for 4 hours and I almost lost, in the end one piece of the life support equipment saved my life when I no longer had the strength to fight for even one more breath. My doctor says it won't always work. My 16 year old daughter lost her mom 2 years ago to cancer now she is getting ready to lose her dad. I thought I was just hurting myself only to find out I am hurting every one that knows me for I am a kind and gentle soul. This is not just about you this is about every body that loves you!!! One of the things I have chosen to do even though I do so at great risk because a common cold can take my life! Is to visit the schools to talk to the kids with tears in my eyes and I take them on a journey through my life and the bad choices I made and where they have led me now. I hide nothing and plead from my heart for them to please consider the cost! I know God has made a way for me to reach them because I see the tears in their eyes and their letters to me touch my soul like healing rain drops washing and purifying me befor God. I can not change it for me BUT I can change it for MANY, GOD help me to do so in a living, real and powerful way. Sad to say some one that knew a teacher in my home town has worked with that teacher to put an end to my speaking in the schools to the kids so that is over now, how this person could be helping people to stop smoking and do this is beyound me but all I can do is pray for her and for the children!

Quit before the symtoms show up, I did not quit even after they showed up now my time is running out. I know I am to young to die because I don't know what I am going to be when I grow up. It is a life and death choice and I did not look at it that way when I still had time, now I am running out of time. And the only choice I have now is how to spend the little time I have left. The hard part is knowing the pain I am leaving behind me with my daughter and family and all the wonderful friends I am leaving.

Let me tell you as I lay in the hospital just having nearly died I did some soul searching as we often do when faced with such things. I asked my self what is most important in life what will I have when I am laying in a bed breathing my last breaths in this world. I found there would be 2 things I would have at that moment.

1st I would have my loved ones around me. These ones have to be earned with love and sacrifice and devotion with compassion with truth and honor and loyalty. It would take time to develope relationships of this kind. Any relationship built on LOVE is very valuable.

2nd I would have my memories. These would be both good and bad. But if I worked at it I could create many good and wonderful memories. It would take LOVE, COMPASSION, DEVOTION, SACRAFICE, TRUTH, HONOR, DILIGENCE, the best of all my qualitys. The best would be doing things for others for those are the gifts of love and sacrifice that earn the loved ones you will have in the end.

So in the end if you have many loved ones and many good and wonderful memories, then you will leave this world very rich indeed. And you will live on in this world in the hearts of many!

SO WHAT KIND OF TREASURES ARE YOU BUILDING AND STORING IN THIS LIFE?????

I created a stop smoking network ( http://howwehavequitsmoking.ning.com/ )

SingleAlaskanMan SingleAlaskanMan 51-55, M 10 Responses Feb 11, 2009

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Your story is so sad and this addiction is so cruel-i am realy trying to quit i cant dye and leave my 2 daughters alone. I will pray for you.

I'm so sorry and my prayers go out to you and yours. You know, my husband smoked for 22 years and hasnt missed a traditional cigarette in the last 2 years because he has been vaping (aka using electronic cigarettes). This is smoking of the future and I hope it puts a huge net up or improves all these crazy health problems people seem to be stricken with( because of smoke). If someone is reading this and thinks it makes perfect sense and wants to ditch tobacco products, I urge that person to Google jvmodshop and check out my profile, it is an alternative smoke shop. Ditch the smoke people, it isn't worth the devastation.

I have COPD. Emphysema I was 42 yrs old when the Drs told me..The Dr said I pribly wouldnt see my 45th birthday.I made a choice to quit smoking..I have one daughter that has 2 kids.and I want more time to be with them.I havent smoked in 6 yrs now andi am doing better.There is days that I struggle just to breath.I dont know what tomorrow holds but I know I can face it knowing I made a difference in my life by quitting.and knowing that maybe my grankids wont smoke seeing what it has done to me.Thank you for your story.

I have COPD. Emphysema I was 42 yrs old when the Drs told me..The Dr said I pribly wouldnt see my 45th birthday.I made a choice to quit smoking..I have one daughter that has 2 kids.and I want more time to be with them.I havent smoked in 6 yrs now andi am doing better.There is days that I struggle just to breath.I dont know what tomorrow holds but I know I can face it knowing I made a difference in my life by quitting.and knowing that maybe my grankids wont smoke seeing what it has done to me.Thank you for your story.

i CAN RELATE

this is not a joke my partner justed died christmas with meso. he suffered 22 years and still cant get money from the basterds that killed him to late for that so you enjoy every breathe you have left in your body peace and love

SAM, i have read your story, and while i see you have a warning for the people of what can happen, it seems to get lost in the fact that there is too many inconsisant things you are telling

SAM, I've seen nothing but good outcomes from lung reduction surgery. I wish you the best. Please keep me posted on your condition and keep your chin up! You can message me anytime!

Jojo

I am in pulmonary rehab now and learning that and I am going to get lung reduction surgery while I wait for lung transplants.

I am so sorry to read of your plight. I have worked with many people with your prognosis through the years. It takes a brave person to write about it as you have done. I only hope a lot of people read your story and learn from it. Do some research, if there's a pulmonary rehab nearby, get involved! There are many things you can be taught such as conserving energy and proper breathing techniques to help improve your quality of life. I'm sad to know your 16 year old daughter have to endure this. Please be strong and keep trying to get through to the kids to not smoke! Best wishes to you!

Jojo