Can You Suspend The Judgement???

In 1989 I had an experience in Alcoholics Anonymous that left me with more questions than answers. I asked around the fellowship for feedback and suggestions and I would only get hurried or terse answers. After that experience that stemmed from a nervous breakdown and forgiveness for a woman whom I thought was a ":*****" I knew that places like A.A. were only the tip of the iceburg and not the "only place" they would have you believe them to be. I happened across a copy of The Course that one person in A.A. had laying around, started looking and reading only understanding a smattering of it. I knew it was based on the concept of forgiveness which was very confirming to me. I was one of those that ended up leaving A.A. to 1. Live life to the fullest (Get happy), and 2. to seek answers.

I ended up playing guitar in a band in Ft. Lauderdale and we were playing this party when I heard this one woman say "Would you rather be right or happy?" which perked my ears because people in A.A. have a similar saying; "Would rather be 'right' than sober" so I went over to say hello and asked her about what she'd said, she then told me about a book called A Return To Love; reflections On The Principles Of The Course In Miracles by Marrianne Williamson and that she would lend me her copy "Sure" I said happily so I read about halfway through the book and liked what she had to say especially about "being at that 12 step meeting" I would like to know the story on that then I picked up my own copy and gave hers back. The book prompted me to get The ACIM itself to try some lessons. A week passes by, nothing, a month nothing and on to a year with no visible results..

I went to churches that advocated The Course with no real change at all. According to them I wasn't "good enough". and "shouldn't be there amongst them." So I researched on the internet for myself and my own growth and eventually after years of being the best "me" that I possibly could, I began to understand The Course more. There are two books I would like to recommend that very much relates to The Course; A New Earth and The Power Of Now both by Eckhart Tolle. The Course in a nutshell.

Greetings. Here is an update on this post. I found a website that is proving to be very useful in understanding the terms in the passages of The Course.

StarWanderer StarWanderer
56-60, M
3 Responses Dec 6, 2011

Thank you. It turns out I've been looking for a mentor with this thing. I've been to a few Course studies at churches and found a lot of unhealed teachers using props to heal and teaching the ego's version of forgiveness and people with personal goals/agendas there. It's a big mess and I don't want to give this more than it's "due". I've made some progress now that things have been explained to me and I'm able to let go of the judgements. I was quite "shaken" by my experience and wanted to learn more about It. Thanks for your responses.

I agree with Tummytocker.l also think you are have a good decent enquiring soul it is not easy to control alcohol dependency so 'well done' you did well.

That's odd that people in the churches that allegedly supporting the Course should tell you that you shouldn't be amongst them. They obviously didn't understand the message of the Course. I too like the writings of Eckhart Tolle and I shall now take a look at the website that you've recommended. Peace and love.