I Don't Like The Way My Mother Lives With Me

My mother and I  have never talked face-to-face. Because I have nothing to talk with her. However, since I was busy with my work before and school now. My mother has been living with me to take care of my almost 3 years old daughter for three years. Once I counted it that my mother repeated one sentence 7 times to my daughter. She is so mindless and selected inappropriate stories to my daughter too. She sleeps with my daughter. Now my daughter is so attached to her and won't sleep with me. I am worried about my daughter. She is not active and sociable at all and attck to other adaults physically and wordly. I know that my mother didn't intend to give bad influence on my daughter. However, she just doesn't know how to raise an independent and physically and mentally healthy kid. In summer she likes open her shirt and shows her breast when I was little and even now. I really don't like it. I can't remember that she had ever hugged me or bought me any present. She just likes to do labor work to contribute to the family. She prepared lunch box for my husband everyday. And my husband likes her to stay to take care of our house. My mother also invited my mother-in-law to live with us and my daughter fought with my mother-in-law. Now two grandmothers live in my house and they talked a lot and I barely say a word to them. I like to live alone. I bought and also borrowed some book's on preschooler's education. I also read a lot on internet. I think I am able to take care of my daughter. My husband doesn't trust me that I can do all the housework. The two grandmother don't speak English and don't teach some useful stuff to my daughter. What the love they can give is to hold her every moment. I suggested my daughter to play alone or with other kids. I am quite angry with the behavior my daughter has right now and worry about her a lot. When I tried to displine my daugher. The grandmother tried to protect her, which makes me more angry. They like living with us since we have a big house and havebedrooms and bathroons for each one. I think the treatment between my husband and my mother-in-law is she wants to live with us now and leave her apartment in China to him after she passed away. Since she gave another apartment to my husband's brother. My husband also wants a place to stay when we are back. My husband cheated me that my mother-in-law would stay for three months. But after three months he said her airplane ticket extends to six months and we will get tax return for their stay. But I can't tolerate them any longer. My mother's visa already expired and she knows that she could't reentry US so don't want to leave. Now my husband talked to me to have another baby. But I asked him to contribute to take care of kids by ourselves. I don't like to relay on my mother any more. I know that it is also my fault on my daughter's education. However, I will try my best when I get full control of it. This is my mother-in-law second time to live with us. She has been here for half yeat before. Opposite to my mother, she doesn't do any housework. She doesn't wash her bowl even. She just like to boil water and cool down to drink. She also does some yard work for my husband. They think that we should have them since we are their daughter and son. But I am not close to them. I don't know it is my problem or theirs'. Could you please give me some suggestion? I may not be so upset if my daughter is a happy and active baby. The relationship between me and my husband is intensive now. He doesn't care about the details I care for. Am I right to live alone and send my daughter to daycare or stay home to look after her? I even think that I can handle another baby by myself. She is my daughter not my mother's. They should raise us as responsible adaults and instead of treating us as babies to be taken care of.

Leo2004558 Leo2004558
Jul 31, 2010