I Wish I Had A Friend
I've always had trouble making close friends. I don't know why really. I wonder if people worry that i'll judge them, as i always try to keep a high moral standard. Like me and one of my friends drifted after she started cheating on her boyfriend - i'd seen them flirting, but she never told me she was cheating on him until it had gone so far, she only told me much later after she had broken up with her bf. Just wondering if part of the reason was because she knew i wouldn't just be interested in all the gossip of it. i knew they were flirting, tho i stayed out of it, tho if she had asked me i would have been honest. Tho for all i know its nothing to do with ppl thinking i'd judge them, i am quieter and shyer, i dunno if ppl don't find me as fun. I would just love to have someone here to just hang out with me or to drag me out or get me motivated. I always used to help ppl with their work, help them with their revision, even do other favours, and sometimes they seemed greatful, but not for very long. Would be nice for someone to be here for me. I feel like i'm a nice person. I mean if i was a mean person then i wouldn't be surprised that i didn't have anyone around me, but i am kind and considerate and helpful. So i don't really get it. I know people say be yourself, but how do you be yourself when you don't know who yourself is?