I Miss Him So Much.

I am a RN and have dealt with death on an almost daily basis for many years. I have experienced the loss of my parents, friends, and in my profession so many patients both young and old. I have seen times where death was a relief to not only the patient and family but to me, just to relieve the suffering. This time, however, I just wasn't prepared. Sure he had been in bad health for a while but no worse than usual. We talked about everything but he didn't tell me he was going to die 12-10-12. He didn't tell me he felt worse. He didn't tell me he needed me. He was just doing his breathing treatment as he did every morning. I heard the machine when I woke up, went to get coffee and I didn't see him. I walked around the sofa and there he was on the floor, between the coffee table and the sofa, nebulizer in hand, face blue, no pulse, no breaths, no Bill.
nursejano nursejano
56-60, F
1 Response Jan 9, 2013

I am sorry for your loss.

It sounds like Bill went fast, little or no pain.

Boy, you are in my age group and maybe he didn't even realize it was his time.

He is at peace - past worrying about wars, rumors of war, bills, breathing problems, aches, etc.

A good book I have is called, "Getting Through The Tough Stuff, It's Always Something" by Charles R. Swindoll and maybe getting that book might help you.

Joining a grief survivors group or even seeing a counselor for a bit might help or just talking to a friend.

Keeping busy helps.

When I am the most depressed, and I do something nice for someone else, a random act of kindness, it always makes me feel better.

Praying helps too if you believe in God.

((( hug )))

/// Pat on back \

Wish I could help make the pain go away.

It will take time.

Your friend was lucky to have someone that cared about him - many people have nobody that cares about them.