A Goal

I set this as a goal because I would love to be able to stop apologizing for the way I am all the time. It's all I do. Every time I talk to someone, I'm apologizing to them for not going somewhere they wanted me to go, not doing something I was supposed to do, not being the way they think I should be & the way everyone else is. I'm tired of apologizing to people for being how I am. For missing appointments because I'm too scared to leave the house to go, for not following through with things, for not replying to people because of the anxiety, for not responding the way they think i should when they talk to me. I'm so tired of apologizing for the way that I am, but I have to. Until I finally come to a point in my life where I accept myself enough & am confident enough to deal with the negative things people say & think about me, I'm going to have to keep apologizing for my behavior to them. I have to keep explaining to people why I do what I do, am how I am, & act how I act, because if I don't they're just going to keep thinking I'm mean. & until I can stop letting their views of me affect me, I'm going to have to keep doing it. I hope & I can't wait for the day to come when I'm finally able to stop apologizing for the way I am to others.

lyricalongings lyricalongings
31-35, F
2 Responses Feb 28, 2010

Thanks :) I wish others felt that way. I wish I felt that way too lol

you're good enough.