Keep Working At It, Because What Else Is There To Do?

I haven't had an especially rough life.  Overall, it hasn't been too bad.  I mean, yes, it's dragged my through stifling monotony, raked me over shale, and ground my head under its cruel steel-toed boot.  I'll admit, there have been moments when I wanted to quit.  It's the only life I have, though.  There aren't any second chances, so I've held on, waiting for the sunrise of a new day and better tomorrows. 

This reflection, and my story here, was brought about by the memory of a recent exchange I had with a customer at my service station job.  During the morning coffee rush, after I asked if there was anything else he needed, he replied, "Do you have new lives?"  Heaven knows we've all had moments like that, when our own patch of withered, starving straw makes a thistle bush look greener.  I was taken aback by my customer's dismay, though, because each and every one of us has to get up in the morning, put our pants on, and slog through another weary day, without any apparent reward or thanks for the precariously imbalanced lot we struggle with and/or against.  Wouldn't it be nice to hoist a white flag and be able to start over, with the opportunity to make better choices?

That won't happen, though.  Sometimes I hate the way things are.  The problems pile up until, as they say, I can't see the forest through the trees any more.  And sometimes I put down my arms and close the door against those nasty issues that won't be resolved.  ****, they'll be there whenever I'm ready to face them again.  That isn't running away from my problems, it's me sparing my aching head from bashing against them for a while.  I find that, given enough time, every issue usually works itself out.  I've come to this conclusion after seeing that all the worrying I used to do never did me one lick of good.  One day, for whatever reason, 2 + 2 didn't fall short of the mark anymore.

And this guy, with his cheeky response to my asking if there was anything else I could help him with?  I wanted to be Marlon Brando in the Godfather, grab him by the collar and yell "You can act like a man!!"  Or, in my own words, chin up, and let's get on with it.
UnderEli UnderEli
46-50, M
May 17, 2012