Cant Stop Thinkin About Him..

I had been seeing this guy for a long time last year, i didnt have that much strong feelings for him than he had for me (i mean he was in LOVE with me lool). He said he didnt want a proper relationship until his exams were over and i was fine with that. He had talked about sex with me alot and i just wasnt interested because i just didnt love him that much to lose it to him. Me and him would see eachother alot outside school and go to eachothers house too. Then one day during summer he asked me to come to his house to just hang out so i did, when i went there the topic just went straight to sex (we had tounged and done other stuff), he finally convinced me and we did it. It was the most awkward thing i have done in my life, i was just thinking to myself when it will end. About a week later we did it again but something went wrong so i had to take a pregancy test, he was soo scared and worried that i was but it came out negative. He stopped talking to me for some reason for months till i saw him at a friend bbq, i knew something was wrong cus all the boys were lookin at me funny, someone then told me that hes been talking s**t about me saying i was a rubbish f*** and how i gave him head. When i got home i just cried because i cudnt believe wht he'd done to me, he called saying sorry but i wasnt having it. Since then, i dont know why but i cant stop thinking about him because i just love him so much, there hasnt been a day that i havent thought about him, i have really strong feelings for him and just feel like an idiot bcus he just treated me like crap, i saw him the other day and had major butterflies that i had to turn my back to him. Iv slept with someone else i hardly knew who wasnt even my bf to get rid of the feeling, but that didnt help at all.
ladi94 ladi94
18-21, F
5 Responses Jan 16, 2011

I don't know... I lost my virginity to a girl who do something like this... horrible horrible... i didn't go to therapy just went from one girl to the next to the next ... but then again Im a guy so its socially acceptable.. and I don't give a **** if I'm horrible at sex cause I get it all the time now... the world is a ****** up confusing place. Good luck with your situation... ps Im sure your not as bad as you think you are... Cause turns out I'm not as bad as that excuse my language that ***** is.

Now i feel nothing for him. Looking back and seeing how stupid i was about him makes me laugh. I see him all the time constantly buh i ignore him even when he tries to make convo. Ive matured now and finally i realise what i had for him wasnt love. Take my advice, whoever is in this situation i say just forget him and move on, delete their number, facebook tweeter whatever! Because theres plenty more out there who would appreicate you more than your ex.

redlipstict. i agree with u 100%..

Thanks for the comments, they've reli helped

I don't think you really love him; you have an attachment formed because of sharing something so intimate and bonding as sex. The best thing for you to do is to seek therapy..honestly it will help you soo much!