Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Wish I Could Turn Back Time

I was so foolish. At that moment, I didnt really care about my future and I figured I should do it because all my friends have lost their virginities and i wouldnt feel so left out if I lost mine too. I thought I could handle the emotional implications of having sex. I knew he was just gonna use me but a long the way, I fell for him because he was so sweet and it really did seem like he liked me. In the end, the reality was he only wanted sex with me and nothing more. Once he found a girl to be his girlfriend, I was done for. 

That heartbreak really messed me up and still continues to mess with me because I still remember him and want him. If I never lost my virginity, I would not be in the situation I am in now. I went on a downward spiral after losing my virginity. 

reset reset 18-21, F 4 Responses May 23, 2012

Your Response


Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear that. :( Please don't punish yourself too much about one mistake... Virginity, as highly as everyone speaks about it, is not so big of a deal that you should fall into a depression. First of all nothing forces you to tell about it to the whole world or even all of your friends that you are no longer a virgin. You should tell it to your future boyfriends no matter the case, but the others you don't have to. When you are young losing your virginity means a world to you obviously and when you lose it too early on you start to regret it thinking that all those girls who save themselves to the marriage are better than you. But honey, that's not true. Besides when you turn 30 you'll be pretty much a freak if you are still a virgin. I don't want to hurt anybody but that's just the way our culture is. I mean being a non-virgin would feel devastating now but experience becomes more valuable when you grow. (I don't mean you should have a one night stand for every day of the week, but for example couple of guys is not too bad.)

Think about a girl who lost her virginity to the most perfect guy at age 23 and then she turned out to be a total sl*t. Then think about yourself having lost your virginity at let's say age 14 and then regret it but you learned the value of love and how much it hurt when someone took advantage of you and decided to wait until your dream prince came before you did it again. You are still 23 and waiting, but life is good again. Who would want to judge you?

People make mistakes. Someone loses her perfect job because of drinking problem, someone loses her virginity because she doesn't know its true value yet. And both mistakes leave the individuals devastated. They might not even think about themselves. They think about the world and other people. "Oh my god, what would they say if they knew? They are gonna think I'm an alcoholic/a wh*re!" And they just don't realize that it's just life.

that's so true. if only people could be more sympathetic about life.

I had kinda the same experience. It hurts and it's been less than a week since he told me that while he thinks I'm a interesting person he only wanted sex with me. It makes me sick that I did that to myself because I also knew what was really going on. I just didn't see my life going anywhere and I needed to make a big change. I thought losing my v-card would be the easiest.

im sorry you experienced that. we kind of have the same story. i went through the same thing. it hurts alot expecially if they take your virginity and your falling for him. it took me a month to get over him. and still till this day he still lingers in my mind for awhile. i have times where it would go back to that day where i lost my virginity. and i understand. very nice story

Im so sorry reset you deserved better than what you got. There are many guys in the world like this who use and throw girls away. You have to only become stronger and not give up ever finding love. There are men and i say men because the person you lost your virginity was a boy not a man. True men would never treat a lady like that. I had a similar experience i got my first kiss in a mental hospital i fell for the guy we exchanged phone numbers never heard from again. i dont see it as a bad thing cause he wasnt good enough for me. Thats a song by the way by toni braxton you should listen to. But i just want to say your a wonderful person dont let this drag you down. The mistakes we make in life should only make us stronger. and your strong already cause of what youve gone through