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He Keeps Tearing My Friendships Apart

My first kiss was this morning. I'm going to turn 15 in three days. I happened to see a guy I knew at the park. He is my old friend's ex. He was the one who tore apart me and my old friend's friendship. I'm still friends with the guy, though. He and I went on a walk and were just chatting because we were just friends. He suddenly just kissed me. I wasn't ready for my first kiss. He just kept kissing me and his tongue was all over my mouth. I had no idea what to do, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I led him to believe I like him as more than a friend, but I don't. I told my best friend about it and she just yelled at me and told me that she thought I was better than that. I really regret even going to the park, because if I didn't, my first kiss might have been with someone I actually love, and my best friend wouldn't be mad at me.
CelizabethR1997 CelizabethR1997 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 18, 2012

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kid, **** high school relationships. i made a horrible mistake of falling in love at your age and i regret everything that i ever did with her. in high school you'll only get your heart ripped out. shortly there after i became a drug addict and an alcoholic. I was a freshman. I quit both mainly being that i ran out of booze and I O.D.'d on 'spice'. falling in love ruined my life, because that person i loved i saw everyday and it completely inhibited my work abilities. if she was there i just went catatonic. I'm just glad she was a senior. after that year i had nothing to do with her.<br />
I would have thrown away my life for a 2-bit *****. i don't know who more to hate, me or her? <br />
at any rate, a friend of mine (her best friend, who i banged) once said that if you regret your first kiss then it didn't happen or it didn't count. I hope this helped, at least a little, oh and by the way, drugs and drinking don't. smoking tobacco does though.