Cheated Gf,now Dejected, Ready To Do Anything To Get Her Back

Hello all,

I hope you all would have read stories of guys cheating on gals and vice versa. This is also a same story.But i hope you guys read my problem which I will present it in detail and kindly advise me with the best plausible solution.I am sorry for the language, grammer and cohesion.I have tried to put my problem in the best way.

I am a Hindu and my gf is a muslim. We were pen friends for more than 5 yrs. We first met in 2007 online. It was due to Orkut, we met each other.We used to chat a lot daily, and then we exchanged pics and phone numbers and used to talk whenever we can. Actually i was in hostel and I didnt have any restriction, where as she was at home and it was difficult for her to talk all the time. She only talked when her parents were not at home. Slowly slowly we became eachothers habit. It became a habit to mail, chat and share the whole days events with each other. Everything went fine. we never thought of meeting, as it was impossible for me to meet her.She finally happened to meet me after 5 yrs and that too for 7months. We met each other,spent time with each other, movies, parks, rides, spent nights also together. We knew our marriage would be near impossible but love drew us together. We liked each others company, infact we were madly and deeply in love with each other. So if everything is so near perfect, then where is the glitch?

I am a Gemini,and if you are interested to astrology, you can visualize the nature of a gemini. I am a sociable man.I like meeting people, talking a lot and being close with any person I come across. I make friends in a jiffy and to me gender is immaterial. I talk to strangers as if they are my relatives or pretty close ones. Thats my nature and I cant go away with it. I visit many chatting portals, mostly I visited chatting.com, and used to hang around there, finding people to talk to. to be frank, I dont like cyber sex. I DONT like it, So i just found people who were decent chatters and shared all my problems. The problems like failing continuously despite studying very hard, bad relations with parents. I used to share all those with them, So i made few friends, to my fate,I made 2-3 friends who were gals. and my gf is very possessive and she didnt like about it, coz i was very close to her. When me and my gf started talking, for 5 yrs, i used to visit chatting portals, whenever i felt i was sad and moody and used to find people to talk to. and when I made good friends, i continued talking to them for a yr or more. In the mean time, i also I had some desires,i am a human after all, i used to send some gals, msges in FB asking them for a date and used to praise their beauty etc. to few of the gals, I felt were prostitues, asked them their charges. Frankly speaking, I never had the guts to really meet a prostitute, but it was the Virtual me which was in desires, and the Real me, was grappling with many problems.

Real Problem:
My gf saw the msges I sent to various gals, asking them for a date , praising them,asking gals for sex ( I had asked for direct sex to 2-3 gals, rest all I asked for a date).All this I did after we met online. But when we were together for 7 months, I reduced my virtual self slowly and was more towards her, at one stage I completely reduced being virtual,as my needs were fulfilled with her. Now I would be going abroad for my higher education for 2yrs. My gf tells me that she doesnt trust me anymore.

Real Qs:
These were the Qs asked by my gf
1)When you were chatting and loved me after chatting for a yr, why did u chat with other gals?
2) I said her I feel in deep love with you after I met you for 7months. In the 7 months time, Why did you chat and send friend requests to gals when you were in love with me?
3) Now that I am going abroad for my masters, The country where i am going, I have sent msges to gals, asking them about the coll, placements etc. Why did you only send to gals ? why not boys?
4) What is the gaurantee that you didnt have sex with anyone? Really guys, I nvr had sex with anyother gal except her. I have lot of desire for sex, I used to quench my thirst on her, thats it. Though, i asked gals in fb for sex, in reality I never never had even though I got few opportunities.

Conclusion:
There were many Qs asked by her, I really didnt have a plain ans. She tells me I am a wommanizer, and i need a gal to talk, to spend my time, to sleep etc. But it is not true. I was back of gals, and after i met her for 7 months, i really felt for her, I really loved her. I nvr thought of anyother gal. I was very happy with her and I was not straying .

Present status.
she has forgiven me now. But says that she would not be able to trust me life long.Even though I am a gentleman from outside, inside me there is this wommanizer. She asks me whats the gurantee that in later stages of life it would not come out.

Suggestions
She has lost complete faith in me now. I want her back with full faith. I have promised myself that, I wont think of anyother gal, or think of sex etc. I know myself I wont not do What should I DO to gain her trust back. In reality it is very difficult for us to get married, But we love each other a lot.

Please give me suggestions. Thanks in advance
stupid1006 stupid1006
26-30, M
Sep 7, 2012