I Relationships
Romance. Relationships And How They Work… Metaphorically Speaking. Part 4…
By:
Sparrowhawk1161
Written on November 4th, 2012
Romance. Relationships and how they work… Metaphorically speaking. Part 4…
____________
So, when we find ourselves not understanding our opposite sex what do we do? A better question is, “How can we understand each other?” We have pulled apart… and now we see things differently.
Yet, many things are the same. We still have feelings. We still have every experience from the time we were born hanging somewhere in our subconscious. Why do we not find it?
To understand this, objective reasoning falls short. So, let me give you a metaphor…
Inside ourselves we must do something with our emotions. We must put them somewhere. They can be tonally hidden.. Brought up later or in a prison. So, what happened?
They are somewhere deep inside of you. Somewhere safe. A place you feel is secure from anyone or anything that can get to it. A hide-away. Your private place.
This place metaphorically speaking is like a castle or keep. It holds the same purpose. TO keep anything from getting in and anything from getting out. It has walls… extremely thick fro defense… fro you never know who or what might want to challenge what is in there. So, you throw all your emotions in it. A fitting place that society tells you is the place that it should be. You have the key to it… but anything you find that is emotional, it’s opened and the threat is thrown in and it is locked away. It can’t get out and nothing can get to it.
Yet, something is wrong… and you know it. No matter how much you try to make it perfectly secure, there is always some opening somewhere. A door…a window and anything else that is there… because when you are hurt, you can feel it coming up and haunt you… maybe make you cry at night. Or haunt you somewhere. So there must be a openings somewhere? Right?
NO matter how you create this fortress there will always be opening somewhere. Like when you drink… you become loose… the openings loosen their hinges and, despite your best efforts, they open up, allowing the pressure to come out.
So what do you do?
Women who have this fortress seem to be different. Most.. But not all. At an early age they can cry on shoulders… express emotions as if there fortresses have many openings that can be opened at will to let out emotions that can bottle up. Yet, guys never seem to have that luxury… not all but a majority have this problem.
HOW do I open up this fortress of emotional repression and allow the emotions to come out? Some guys believe it should never some out. Macho? Unsafe? But, it will come out… like tea kettle just waiting for an outlet…and
BANG! You are out of control!
Women seem to have more open fortresses…which allows them to express feelings more freely…which helps them understand guys rock-hard fortresses… find openings and seek areas to find who he is… and even help him with emotional build-up and help him escape from a fortress he was told to have since he was almost born.. That rock hard keep where nothing comes in and nothing comes out,
Yet, no keep, fortress or castle is impregnable. And women find those weaknesses.
This explains many of the problems of couples trying to see eye to eye. They come from two emotional backgrounds. Forged from the time that they were born till the time you have the problem.
Exposure. Exposure of what is hidden in our own keeps we build to shield or emotions from society… a society that tells us that we can not afford to have emotions… for emotions are weaknesses and the world we live in… which we created… to make us fortify our emotional keeps, is the safest way to go… so don’t show it to anyone…
Not even to the ones you love most!
So, that is the problem! And, many of our problems with relationships hinge on it.
What can we do to change it? What can we do to stop this emotional segregation so we can have healthier relationships
____________
So, when we find ourselves not understanding our opposite sex what do we do? A better question is, “How can we understand each other?” We have pulled apart… and now we see things differently.
Yet, many things are the same. We still have feelings. We still have every experience from the time we were born hanging somewhere in our subconscious. Why do we not find it?
To understand this, ob
Inside ourselves we must do something with our emotions. We must put them somewhere. They can be tonally hidden.. Brought up later or in a prison. So, what happened?
They are somewhere deep inside of you. Somewhere safe. A place you feel is secure from anyone or anything that can get to it. A hide-away. Your private place.
This place metaphorically speaking is like a castle or keep. It holds the same purpose. TO keep anything from getting in and anything from getting out. It has walls… extremely thick fro defense… fro you never know who or what might want to challenge what is in there. So, you throw all your emotions in it. A fitting place that society tells you is the place that it should be. You have the key to it… but anything you find that is emotional, it’s opened and the threat is thrown in and it is locked away. It can’t get out and nothing can get to it.
Yet, something is wrong… and you know it. No matter how much you try to make it perfectly secure, there is always some opening somewhere. A door…a window and anything else that is there… because when you are hurt, you can feel it coming up and haunt you… maybe make you cry at night. Or haunt you somewhere. So there must be a openings somewhere? Right?
NO matter how you create this fortress there will always be opening somewhere. Like when you drink… you become loose… the openings loosen their hinges and, despite your best efforts, they open up, allowing the pressure to come out.
So what do you do?
Women who have this fortress seem to be different. Most.. But not all. At an early age they can cry on shoulders… express emotions as if there fortresses have many openings that can be opened at will to let out emotions that can bottle up. Yet, guys never seem to have that luxury… not all but a majority have this problem.
HOW do I open up this fortress of emotional repression and allow the emotions to come out? Some guys believe it should never some out. Macho? Unsafe? But, it will come out… like tea kettle just waiting for an outlet…and
BANG! You are out of control!
Women seem to have more open fortresses…which allows them to express feelings more freely…which helps them understand guys rock-hard fortresses… find openings and seek areas to find who he is… and even help him with emotional build-up and help him escape from a fortress he was told to have since he was almost born.. That rock hard keep where nothing comes in and nothing comes out,
Yet, no keep, fortress or castle is impregnable. And women find those weaknesses.
This explains many of the problems of couples trying to see eye to eye. They come from two emotional backgrounds. Forged from the time that they were born till the time you have the problem.
Exposure. Exposure of what is hidden in our own keeps we build to shield or emotions from society… a society that tells us that we can not afford to have emotions… for emotions are weaknesses and the world we live in… which we created… to make us fortify our emotional keeps, is the safest way to go… so don’t show it to anyone…
Not even to the ones you love most!
So, that is the problem! And, many of our problems with relationships hinge on it.
What can we do to change it? What can we do to stop this emotional segregation so we can have healthier relationships
By:
Sparrowhawk1161
Age:
51-55
,
Male
