I Remember My First Crossdressing Experience
I was 11 years old, and my mom needed to make room in her closet. Her problem was that she never got rid of her old sentimental dresses. She kept her dresses from high school prom. She saved her wedding gown as well as every bridesmaid dress she had. Every dress from every special occasion was saved, even a costume from a play she was in. She never wore these old things, and never expected to wear them again. They were all kept in clear plastic bags. I was only using half of my closet space. So all these old sentimental dresses were moved into my closet.
Every time I entered my closet my eyes would focus on these petticoats, shiny satin, organza, chiffon and jewel-like colors. There was one red velvet dress with a satin-like liner. There were paste diamonds sewn into the bodice. I always thought that velvet dress was the most beautiful dress I've ever seen. So it was the one I gravitated toward, when I first experimented with cross-dressing.
I was a small guy, and well known in my class for being skinny, so there was no dress I couldn't fit into. Even so, I remember that red velvet dress had a tight bodice with a back zipper that was hard to reach. The the skirt flared out forming a circle. I could tell it was suppose to have a slip-petticoat.
Wearing that dress was a wonderful experience. Its was so stimulating, that my body would be shaking with anticipation and nervious excitement. I thought I could explode. The sensation was magnified just by my hands accidently coming in contact with the fabric.
I could tell it was all in my brain. Evidently my brain was interpreting cross-dressing as actual contact with a female. Neurotranmitters in my brain were being released; dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and other pleasure neurotransmitters where producing sensations of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and self-identity. I experienced instant gratification as it affected the reward centers in my brain, and I was addicted.
I didn't want to have an addiction that people regarded as a perversion. I knew I was heterosexual. So began years of trying to hide, and praying it would go away, and practicing discipline and self denial. I was determined to be normal.
Every time I entered my closet my eyes would focus on these petticoats, shiny satin, organza, chiffon and jewel-like colors. There was one red velvet dress with a satin-like liner. There were paste diamonds sewn into the bodice. I always thought that velvet dress was the most beautiful dress I've ever seen. So it was the one I gravitated toward, when I first experimented with cross-dressing.
I was a small guy, and well known in my class for being skinny, so there was no dress I couldn't fit into. Even so, I remember that red velvet dress had a tight bodice with a back zipper that was hard to reach. The the skirt flared out forming a circle. I could tell it was suppose to have a slip-petticoat.
Wearing that dress was a wonderful experience. Its was so stimulating, that my body would be shaking with anticipation and nervious excitement. I thought I could explode. The sensation was magnified just by my hands accidently coming in contact with the fabric.
I could tell it was all in my brain. Evidently my brain was interpreting cross-dressing as actual contact with a female. Neurotranmitters in my brain were being released; dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and other pleasure neurotransmitters where producing sensations of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and self-identity. I experienced instant gratification as it affected the reward centers in my brain, and I was addicted.
I didn't want to have an addiction that people regarded as a perversion. I knew I was heterosexual. So began years of trying to hide, and praying it would go away, and practicing discipline and self denial. I was determined to be normal.
By:
WPDP
Age:
41-45
3
responses
