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Kiss Good Bye

I knew her a few weeks. I was 17. Young, stupid and romantic. I didn't had  big social life at that time. Sometimes, party here and there. A few pubs with live music were open in my city usually on weekends. Sort of disco and pop music - 80's. One was to dress in certain way, dance in a way, and behave like them otherwise one didn't had a chance to connect. Usually, I stood against the wall, danced alone or walked around just to kill time.

It was a weekend when I decided to go crazy. I went to the pub to spent some lonely hours. She was there dancing with her friends - all colorful. She looked like punk but I sensed that she came from the high society. Just her mannerisms and the way she moved around. There was something profound about her. She had short hair tied up with all colors of the rainbow on it. She wore long purple stockings and heavy red shoes, short skirt and red leather jacket. Hands were all in gloves with no fingers. I looked at her whenever I could, but I was hiding as I never wanted to be noticed.

Usually it was like that – a few fast dances, everybody going mad, total exhaustion and break, something slow you could grab somebody and dance with them.There came a slow dance. I was standing in a corner - just the most abandoned one ever, all dark and spooky. It was great that nobody even noticed that I existed. She marched towards me. I thought I was dreaming. It was the best time to run but it happened so fast that I was surprised and there was no way out from the freaking corner.

She appeared in  front of me, looked at the biggest loser ever and said,"You were staring at me."
I tried to come up with something brilliant to drop her on her knees, to show how smart I was and everything but I could only utter ,"Meee?"   
"Yes," she said. "All the time. I am leaving now. Would you come along with me?" She took my hand and pulled me outside.

We walked and walked. She was talking about her life,  her feelings, life on other planets, her dreams … I was listening. I was one big ear trying to say something but I could not. It was pretty bad. I felt powerless. I felt like drunk. I could not find anything - even remotely close to her beauty. I could not say anything. I thought I am losing it but...

"You are different,"she said and added,"You don’t talk nonsense. I like that."   

She was in ballet school. Dance was her life. She showed me. She tried dance with me. I guess elephant could be better. She was laughing and laughing about it. She was so happy when I was trying to keep up.

"Don’t worry, " she said. "I will teach you how to dance. I will show you how to feel it."  

We were meeting almost every day. She was choosing places. Abandoned houses, old bridges, hidden parks. After three weeks she took me on the beach. We were siting there for a while.

Then she said,"I am seeing this older man. He won't let me go." She kissed me and  left. I thought to die now is the best way to go now. I went to the sea but water was so cold. I postponed and I never saw her again.  

Bolek Bolek 41-45, M 49 Responses Jun 2, 2012

Your Response


omg this story brought tears into my eyes :o well like they say some people come and go maybe her going is for the best :) its better off knowing before then later :)

Your writing is wonderful. Very talented you!
(っ◕‿◕)っ ♥ HaPpY VaLeNtInE's DaY !!!

Thank you. Love you. So sweet. You are an angel.
Have a wonderful Valentines Day! Hugs and many kisses.

Full circle - Loving someone who belongs to another is trying to reach out and capture the unattainable - you and she were living on borrowed time – The older man was her center, her stability. You, the younger, ‘her tangential and changeability. But you desire to be with each other was not strong enough – it could not break the course of what eventually came to pass - and so, each of you returned to where you had initially started at – with bitter-sweet memories, regrets and pain to signify what had once lived but is now extinct.

Great analyse.
You are so right.
Thank you for reading me.
It was a pleasure t read your respond.

Good story. Feels so bad to let someone go. I let go of a girl after Highschool. She came over one time and we watched a movie alone together. She inched her way closer to me and undid my belt slowly. We interlocked hands and kissed. She started by taking her small jeans off, then her shirt and then her panties. She left her bra for me to unhook. I took my shorts off and then my shirt and left my underwear for her to pull off. She gently placed herself ontop of me with her breasts on my face. I struggled to undo her bra hook but eventually got it off. She rubbed her smooth vagina on the head of my penis with my underwear as the only thing separating us. We kissed eachother and i put my hands on her bum while she glided over my penis making it larger and larger as she passed by. Finally it came. My penis looked about 7 inches long so she gripped onto my waistband and pulled it down past my penis. He was ready. I rolled the condom on and pushed upwards. Too dry. I asked her if she could go to my room to get lubrication for me to slide in.

I waited about 5 minutes before i heard her scream. My parents were home. She ran back to me to get her clothes on, but it was too late. My parents were inside and they turned the lights on. I was standing there with a condom on and in my underwear. My mum screamed and my dad yelled. She managed to get her clothes on and drove off straight away.

Dad sat me down on the couch while i was still in my underwear. He taught me how to have sex but i already knew from past experience. He stood up and walked over to me. He rolled down my waistband and showed me how to put on my condom correctly. I was just sitting there traumatised. My parents caught me just about to have sex. My dad did the right thing though.

Sorry for the long story

i admire the way you described every bit of this story...i would be happy to read more

Thank you.
So please tell me more about you dislike for government?
You don't like just this one or government at all?
Seems like a lot of people are really up set about this one?

Let's talk.
Let me understand this.
I wish you all the best.

heheheh definately i dont hate the government in general i hate corrupted one, especially the one we have in our country now coz they are fake..let us talk about it seperatly

What government would you like to have in place?
For whom would you vote now?

the kind of government who utilize the power of youth to generate new ideas for development, with no discrimination towards anythin, get back the dignity we lost and stop increasing our debt while we have all the resources but the government is the one who eats people right... you dont know how we were and where we are right now, it is very sad to see everything falling apart.

i dont see a good candidate now, but i will go for the least risky person in my opinion

Are you Muslim?
What should happen today?

religion doesnt have to do anything here, as i told you i hate discrimination..
today a scream to let the government here that we are all one hand together against them and we wont let them do worse than the old government

Are you planing manifestation?
If so that is OK - you have a rights to do that.
Did you heard about anonymous?
What do you think about him and his movement?

About Anonymous, i hard some rumors and news about him and his movement, however his strategy for me i cant fully identify but i believe it is a compelety different state of mind than what i am talking about, there might be minor similarities still

Can you describe your state of mind?
If I wish to support you what should I do?
Are we asking government to resigned or change a course?
What we want?

we are asking the government to resign and have a new election and have the army take over during the transition period
the state to mind is revoluting against was has been done during the last year ( many things i cant explain here)... to support there is paper you sign that states you are against the government which will be presented to court and you have to go on the streets now in a strike against the current government

Why do you bring Egypt situation to whole story?

i cant get your question? explain wht do u mean..

In stories on your page I saw something about Egypt.
Why do you focus on situation in that country?

i am refering to an old event that i wrote more than 2 years ago about 25 Jan revolution

So you are in Egypt now or America?
I have some woman friends from Egypt there is not so much room for ladies in politics in Egypt.
Generally men are dealing with all life there and woman even they wish to be free remain in shadow.
How is it with you?

I am living in Egypt, but i believe i am quite different than they women you know. it depends the education you got, community you are raised in and the way u look at things. Yes men here are more dominant but we are striving for our rights

You behave on this site like you would like to encourage people to fight with you for freedom of your country?

Am I getting that impression right?

nope, i am the one who is fighting while i am expressing my opinion and sharing experiences like everyone does which is mainly the purpose of EP.
sometimes i like to hear other people experiences and opinions about similar situations

So Good luck with your mission and be safe.
Keep us up to date how your fight is going.

I got a bit confused by comment made by... under your story.
I though it maybe local but it seems like is not.

You mention Muslim and Christina in your story so I though maybe religious but you explain me that is not.

I saw your questions so I thought I saw similar once before but I think different people ask the same question over and over.

You are very fresh on EP but you behave like old cat but you seems to be educated and smart so you could figure out things quickly.

It took me a few weeks before I could navigate here and know what is it about.

We have weather issues in America now so it is not the best time to refocus.

You contact me and it was about first kiss so I did not know about your political struggle. This is story which is long time buried among other stories and not many people read it for long time...So I was confused.

Thank you for your explanations.

We pray for your safety, equal rights for all Egyptians and full democracy there.

The army is all the time in control in your country all my Egyptian friends agree with that but who really knows.

All the best.
Time to rest.

i look for stories that people write them in a different way not the conventionel way of expressing things.
for the kind of stories, diverse ones are the best!

i will keep you updated, today we are given the day off -as am wokring in a private company- which is considered as a force majeure.

i had a chance to read some of your posts which is interesting and when i have time i will look at your articles which serves different matters in the community.. i read two already

Thank you for reading me and your interest in me.
I am journalist and writer.
I would love to conduct interview with you if you don't mind.
I have a site Our Site.
Please take a look.
I hope you will like it.

We are watching Egypt today as well.
It is massive and responsible.
It is peaceful and determine.

Keep it peaceful.
It needs a bit time to move establishment.
They are working how to resolve the problem like officials.
Your president represent group of people and is not that important.
They I believe can suggest some changes to quiet crowd but it will be all the same. You have to suggest your leader that you trust completely.

If you wish freedom and democracy you should bring to play your own people. Next it need lot of work to replace apparatus that is already in place with your people. It needs time and and right people. If that will not happen change is impossible. It is at least 10 yr work. However if you put your leader and he will surround with his own people next day will be better then before. That is how this can be done. It is long work and hard work with lots of ups and down but seems like you are ready.

No violence - please.

yesterfay it was peaceful except for two small town. i agree with your above mentioned opinion about having a leader, however, if you asked any one of us will tell you we dont have a leader even the national rescue committee that some of them were candidates in the presidential elections still looking for their own benefit and not the country's benefit. that is why people are asking for an early election and a transition period where the army takes over, at the same time people can check each candidate program carefully and choose the least ricky one...

it is tough for all of us...yesterday the presidential committee offered an open discussion for all the protestors but none accepted it and tomorrow 2nd July there will be another day like 30 june.

i checked you website:) it is nice and lets talk and arrange if you wanna more about what is happenning around

I will establish for you special page in my news section.
Please send me daily up date of what is happening in your country and we will post it on Our Site. You can do daily report form Egypt how all the situation is developing. You can send as well some pictures. We can share this as well with EP. Send me all the text max 3 pages per one text on my private address: Tell me if you would like to be Our Corespondent. I am going call this series Egypt - Cry in The Shadow of The Pyramids. What do you think? I wish you all the best. Solidarity with People of Egypt

Sorry i have been busy with all what is happenning around... i wish i can be able to help you with by a correspondant, i will try to write you something but i dont know if i can do it on daily basis.
about the name, I prefer you go with something related to Egyptians and how they are again creating theirs history and doesnt accepting any beauracracy and delllusion... Egyptian is seeking their glory, something that shows what the people here are doing in pain

Thank you for the story.
I got it. I posted.
I am waiting for more.
Great stuff - Aziza.

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Very tell it so simple (not too much information). I really liked it.

Thank you.
It was very kind of you.

So poetic. You wrote down these words like color on canvas. The detail is vivid, the story reels in the audience, and I can almost feel as if I'm in your past position- as if it is MY kiss goodbye. This is truly brilliant, very thought provoking. It's definitely one of "those stories." You know, the ones that make you think about life and other nonsense? THAT kind of story.

As for editing; your first 'had' was meant to be 'have,' I believe. Some sentences could probably be worded just a little different. You're very descriptive of the girl, but not so much yourself. You say, "It was a weekend when I decided to go crazy," in the second paragraph, yet in the very last sentence of that same paragraph, you explain how you don't want to be noticed. Explain exactly what you mean and why you mean it. When you do something, tell us why. It's not that we don't understand it, it's that we want to feel it.. to be as close to the story as you were when you lived it. Then, this story would be spotless.

Or not. What do I know? I doubt I could ever write something so beautiful. I'm just a silly reviser. :P

Still, really magnificent. Thank you and God bless :)!

Thank you so much for reading me and your kind words.
This story was edited 3 times.
I agree with you totally that each of my stories should be spotless.
No doubt in my mind.
I am very, very happy that you took your time and read it and wrote your comment. I very much so appreciate that.

I think it should be "have". I will fix that.

It was story like - me and what I see. I saw her and did not see much myself. That is way is just a little about me and how I look. However there is some psychological portrait of me plus I wrote that than you can see how my mind works.

However in the end I totally agree about what you said. If you wish to know more how I looked there is my duty to deliver. I am writer and I write for you. I am your servant in this manner and you can and you should demand form me thing as you wish to know and see. I will do all my best to make it right in the future.

When you lash me for something because you crave to know and wish have more of me and the way you want... I can't feel other way than very, very happy.

You take me to your heart, you take me to your mind, you take me to your home and family and make me be for you as much as you desire. I dreamt to have such a relationship with my readers. Now I feel that they feel, they care and they want me and I want to be for them as they want. I heard this request a few times and I will do my best to make it better in the future.

In terms of sentences and how they run I will have to see your propositions on that. I may like it or not - take it or leave it. I am pretty happy how they look now.

Finally - I was ironic saying - I decided to go crazy. As you find out in this story I was standing hidden in shadow supporting the wall to not fall down. I wanted to go among people of my age but I was kind of black sheep. I wasn't exactly like them. They wasn't crazy about me. I could stay at home and bite my nails or go and see some people having fun. I decided to go knowing that it will be another disappointing evening. However better be around people on the weekend than alone home. I was outsider and I didn't want to be seen by them. They have not much good to offer to me. However she had.

I would love to if you would read more of my stories and comment on them in similar way. Thank you.

Honey alwayz remember some fruitfull trees are only seasonal n the time dat we spent wz unforgettable v can't get dat back but future can give you much much better then wat you lost:)

Sweet Heart.
Nice to meet you.
That is very true.
I hope that the future will be friendly for both of us.

its a nice story peter...can you make about on 2012/mayan calendar or the title is "Leaves We Are"...

Thank you.
Please message me and explain what would you like me to do.
Have wonderful day or night.

A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.

Thanks for sharing! Godbls u

Yes. It is sad. But there is the hope that next time will be different.
Thank you.
God bless you too.

wow, what a touching story. I feel for both of you. Those teen years are so beautiful yet so hard!

Yes. It was.
I am trying to touch and next live in your mind.

in my mind?

Of course.

That's a better story than my first kiss lol I'm sorry things didn't work out D:

Hm. I hope next ones were better.

"He won't let me go." What a sad line.

Sad. But on happy note here... hm maybe there is the only one happy here. It was 30 years ago.

Wow it sounds like this girl made a huge impact in your life, for you to remember such details of what she was wearin 30 years ago. I wish my first kiss was like this, so romantic and mysterious. Thankyou for sharing your story, i'm glad I took the time to read it.

Yes she was very colorful and unique. It is hard to forget. Not all the details but most of them. Thanks for your time.

There are people that come into our lives that define a moment, play against or psyche and leave us breathless for an eternity. Beautiful.

These people made us who we are.
Thank you.

These type of interactions seem like a million years ago for me, like it happened to another person when I think of similar situations.

Hm. It is 30 years old story. A lot of changed but a lot is still alive. I think you can relate to that true. All can still happen and your next kiss can be like you first one.

I'm tired of meaningless interactions at this point. People who just want the physical side and nothing else just depress me further.

Yes. I understand that and I can relate to it. In my case I don't look for any physical at all. You are safe here. Share you inside with me and forget that you have body at all.

I wasn't worried or accusing you of anything. Just stating the point I'm at now after failed relationships.

Yes. I remember your story. I didn't though you are accusing me. We always had spiritual connection here.

Maybe ;)

Maybe is always better then nothing.

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I feel like I'm watching one of my stories and I'm sniffling and thinking "But no!! You're supposed to run away with each other! It's meant to beee!!" But there's something so sweet and romantic about that being just memory, and it inspired me to remember my own first kiss. It's beautiful.

You are beautiful through your mind. Thank you.

This is a nice story, but being the pathetic romantic I am, I could not help but to be sad. :(

Don't be sad please. It was 30 years ago.

sad ending; but you got a kiss from her. I think most everyone meet someone that has an effect on them, and would never forget.

Yes I did get a chance to be kiss by her. Once. She smelled like wild strawberry.

1980 18 and first kiss , 2012 15 and pregnant , i dont want to live on this planet anymore

I understand. Please stick with me all will be good.

u tottaly misunderstood everything i said , i was talkin about how times change people in 1980 used to get their first kiss at 18 and now in 2012 there are pregnant 14 year olds , and "i dont want to live on this planet anymore" is a famous qoute they say when ever somethin is wrong

I am pregnant too and virgin and I love it.

Thank you Peter :-)

Thank you !!! For everything.

........... I AM ......... ♥


Awww this was very touching and something most of us can identify with.

I am glad to have you as a friend.

I felt it somehow. Moving something inside me.

Wonderful. Thank you so much.


"hmm" Sounds good to me.

This is beautiful in a sense of finding love...

Yes. I felt amazing for almost 3 weeks.

*professional (lol)

This actually sounded extremely unprofessional and I would advise you to write more like this!!

Love you all. Need you all. Will die for you all.

Thunderlady- Do you call me a snot??

No. I don't think so. I said I love you all. Peace.

Lol....I didn't mean you Bolek. I was referring to Thunderlady. I can't speak to her/ get through to her, and she called me a snob. No bother :)

I am Peter. I know. But she said she feels like under attack or something. She quit being a friend because of that. I have no idea what is happening. I am totally confused. Still love, compassion and peace for all. Please stay with me on this.

Its all cool. Yes we have peace. :P

Good. I love peace.
I would like to ask you if you could read more of my stories and tell me what do you think.
I hope life is treating you great.

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Wow....that is the most breath taking story I have heard in a while. Some girl I must say.

Ouu. That is so nice of you. Your opinion is very important to me. I will write in this mood for sure. Thanks. Keep in touch.

Sure will!! :)


Oh my goodness. I just looove this story. :-) It was like an excerpt from a novel.

You are so nice. You make me want write more and more.

You should! I will read it all.

I am happy now. Thank you.

You write from the heart, I love reading your stories, its like I get lost in them

Thank you xx

Whenever you ask me I will always say I write for you only for you.

out of my league yet a short moment of attraction, melted in fusion. her overwhelming personality and you the backdrop, like a huge painting on a blank wall, supporting but not in focus, hidden behind that awesome attractive picture, like a nail the kiss got embedded not only on lips but in heart, fluttery kiss that locked all memories in a moment. Beautiful :))

Wow. This is almost like poetry. You paint with the words beautifully. I love your paintings.

its your's...:)

Through your eyes.

ever you felt you love her? once? or it was a 'like' feeling

I felt that I want to be with her and spend time with her. I thought about her all the time. I loved everything about her at that time. I miss her terrible when she was not around. I saw only good and positive about her. Was It love ? We did not have chance for deep bond which comes when you are together for long time with somebody. But if she would ask me if I love her I would said yes.

well at least she fancied you. good description of your feelings

Yes she was very inspirational.

Nice romantic touchy story............

All what I wished for was to touch your heart.


Great. Thank you.

SO Romantic.

Yes. I am very Romantic but realistic as well.

Interesting story...You seem to have had some memorable experiences *smiles*

Yes that is true. I hope you have a great day.

Wow, that's amazing. Is this a true story? It seems so fictional to seem realistic. A girl like her seems like the type who just wanted to seduce a man to fall for her and then walk away feeling powerful. Anyways, sweet story :) Very intriguing!

It is true story. But it was not my first kiss but very close by. Thank you for your kind comment.

Wow nice, that's very interesting!

great story!

You are very kind. Thank you for your comment.

It is difficult to feel something that powerful just to lose it...I love your writing...thanks for sharing

I am glad you felt it.

Be glad that she's still out there somewhere. Some of us aren't so lucky.

Yes. I am very happy about that. She still is amazing.

what a lovely story, but with a sad ending <>

I am sorry your great story had a sad ending


Yes and truth always makes a better story

It makes me sad, i dont know why, maybe because of i can feel it deeply.

you are an incurable romantic ... meaning, it hasn't been beaten out of you. often, the saddest moments hold incredible beauty. what a rush that a girl like that noticed you, right? ;) thanks for writing this out, and i hope she sees it and recognizes herself -- and you!

Kind. Warm. Compassionate. Wise. Charming. That is all you. Thank you for being you.

hmn, not sure that's me, bolek. it sounded like a fun 3 weeks, anyway ... not bad at 17! plus, it wasn't "romantic" enough for you to actually kill yourself, thank goodness. (your comment about the water being too cold to get in to kill yourself made me laugh ... that's not kind, warm, compassionate, etc. lol)

You try but you won't hide. It should be sad and funny at the same time. What you can know about love anyway when you are 17. My name is Peter. I said about killing myself to emphasize how deeply I loved her but still my understanding of love was that little that can't lead to anything serious. I am adult now and ready to do anything...

so you live and learn, peter. that's the fun of life.

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Great story, sad in the end. Sorry.

Thank you. In the end is sad but I tried be funny in the middle.

I see.


Thank you my dear.

A very nice but sad story :(

Well. What you can do.