Male P.O.V. 12 Years Old

More years ago than I care to think about so memories of some details are gone, but...

I can't remember how I first met her. Our parents weren't friends. We went to the same school but she was two years behind me. I was in band and she was in orchestra. One of my earliest memories is of sneaking into the balcony of the auditorium/theatre in school where rehearsals took place at lunchtime. Students weren't supposed to be there; I peeked over the railing to see her and watch her play in the small ensemble. I was frightened about being caught but this just added to the experience.

At this time, my family was having a house built in another suburb. We must have sold our old house because we had to shift into a rented house. By what must have been good Karma or the most amazing coincidence, the house we rented backed onto HER house with just a small alleyway between us. I have a fuzzy memory of exchanging notes with her with our code of "H-H" for "holding hands" at some time walking home after school.

I can remember the first feelings of closeness -- even intimacy in terms of sharing such new and powerful feelings with a girl.

It must have been late spring because we children in the neighbourhood played outside in the evenings until we were called inside by our parents. My girlfriend and I might have shared little kisses before the ones I remember so strongly. It seems likely but I don't remember for sure.

There was this huge tree (maybe some kind of willow?) close to our houses where if we stood up next to the trunk, the branches and leaves surrounded us and hid us from everything. Somehow we came up with the idea of "G-N-K" or "good night kiss" under this tree when we were called inside. Here is where, for the first time, we actually held each other and kissed on the lips...

I can remember my hands behind her back and pulling her close. I can remember our lips coming together and noses close. I can remember closing my eyes and such a feeling of tenderness, belonging, sharing and care that was so powerful and mysterious, it could have blown my head off. I'd never had such a feeling before and I was totally consumed. This became our "kissing tree"; the place of such potent, exciting and personally defining memories after so many many years.

Of course I don't know how it was for her. She 'dropped' me some weeks later and I was a shattered wreck. I cried and was totally miserable for days. I'll always remember my mother advising me: "Don't worry! you're young and only just starting. There will be other girls." Yes, of course there were... but there has never been anything like that first big real kiss.






doughdi doughdi
61-65, M
1 Response Mar 10, 2009

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