I Remember My First Love
I know this is a place to shear stories and most of them are short but to the point stories… I’m writing 12 years in one story I couldn’t find a way to summaries it…..
I met my first love in 6th grade. We live in a small town so we were in all the same classes and had lunch together. I quickly fell head over heels for him and decided then that I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. Of course 12 year old boys aren’t interested in anything other then Pokémon and Brittany Spears. And all he talked about was joining the Marines and following in his big brothers footsteps. So I had to settle for being his best friend. We continued to be best friends all through high school but sophomore year I wanted more then friendship so I asked him out of course he said no but I never gave up even after hearing “we are best friends, I don’t want to ruin that” a couple times I know in my heart that we were meant to be. I know what you’re thinking that it sounds like I’m obsessed but it wasn’t like every day that I was asking him it was like once maybe twice a year. And if you ever felt that way about someone you would do what ever it took to get him to see you that way too….. So I did everything I could. We would hang out a lot after school he would drive me home and it was the greatest we spent a lot of time together. I eventually got the nickname “Stalker” but it was only a joke. Every year for his birthday I would bake him a cake and he would always look at it like it was poisoned but he would take it anyway and when he was done he would tell me of how great it was…. Of course I knew that… I would spend all year baking trying to practice so his would be amazing and they always were! He was my best friend and I was madly in love with him, just as much as I had been in 6th grade. Every year for Halloween the wildlife park does a Haunted Tram Ride and it is great fun. My birthday is a week before Halloween and so on the day of my birthday he took me to the wildlife park, no to go on the tram ride, we walked around for hours talking and looking at the animals it was the greatest I was so happy. We were down in the underwater observation center looking at the manatees and after standing there in silence for what could have been two minutes he leaned down and kissed me. My dreams were coming true it was like the world had stopped in that single kiss. A few days later he took me to the tram ride and I hate scary things so I held on to him with my eyes closed most of the time and he had his arm around me keeping me safe…it was like he had finally realize that what I had been saying all those years was right. Of course nothing last forever so after about a week or so he wouldn’t return any of my phone calls and he would avoid me at school. I’m not stupid I know he was so I gave him his space…..he eventually started talking to me and saying you haven’t been stalking me lately what’s wrong… I would answer because I got the message so I was leaving you alone…. I played it cool but inside my heart was breaking. He had made my heart break so many times over the years from me loving him so much and not getting the feeling in return, but it never got easier. You would think that after all that I would give up… nope I still loved him just the same. A few years after graduation, yes we still spent a lot of time together but I was giving up hope. I started seeing someone new and got married. That was a big mistake! I had always know that but I felt that if I couldn’t have the one guy that held my heart I would leave it with him and move on with my life. The day of my wedding all I could think about was him and how I had hoped that he was going to be there. He wasn’t. He didn’t talk to me for about a year and one day I got a e-mail telling me that I needed to call him he wanted to talk to me… I was sitting having lunch with my husband when I got the e-mail and it was like he didn’t matter. My husband and I had been having a lot of trouble and he knew even before we were married on how I felt about him. I waited till that night to call him. He told me that his dad was very sick and that he wanted me to come see him at the local hospital. The next day I went. Not have seen him in over a year I was very anxious. I went up to the room wear his dad was and there he stood I knew that was the end. He still held my heart in his pocket. I said hello to the family and we went for a walk out to this courtyard area. I couldn’t help thinking how I had missed him and that past year was nothing but bad because I hadn’t had my best friend there. His brother and sister-in-law came from out of state with their two young boys. I finally got to meet his big brother, the one who he had always talked so great about. He was here on leave from the Marines he had been pulled from over seas to come see his dad. Through out the years being his best friend I grew close to his family and his family knew how I felt all those years. His dad would always say that I was his daughter-in-law and I called his mom mom as well. I saw myself still spending my last days with him at this point I was starting to give up but seeing him with those boys, one 4 and the other 6, I wanted that. I saw how great he was with them and in my opinion his family made beautiful babies and I wanted that… they stayed for a week or so and life went back to normal. A month after he had e-mailed me his dad had past away and it was hard to see my best friend in so much pain but I was glad that he wanted me to be there to comfort him. His brother, sister-in-law and nephews were staying at his moms house and after a few drinks his mom and sister-in-law got into it. I was there when his brother started going off at the mouth and of course he said something about me and how I should be with my husband and not spending so much time over at his house. Of course he didn’t care about what he was saying even though I had sent my husband packing and was working on divorce papers (the divorce had nothing to do with my best friend) so when his brother sobered up and tried to give me some sad apology and said you don’t have to accept it its up to you I told him that he needed to know the whole story before he ran his mouth and talked about someone he had no idea what the story was and I walked away. His brother went back over seas and his sister-in-law and nephews went back home and every thing went back to normal here at home. I was moving into a new apartment and my best friend helped. That night things went further then a kiss and after all that it was not like I had dreamed. I think at that point I think I had hit the lowest heartbreak yet. Well that’s what I thought. During my divorce process it was hard hearing the things going around town. My best friend worked with my soon to be ex’s brother and words were said. If the words that were told to me were true or not, I don’t know but they were not nice at all. So I started to avoid talking to anyone but that didn’t stop it finally I talked to my friends mom and she told me that he had said that until everything was finalized between my ex and I he was trying not to talk to me because it was causing a lot of trouble. I started talking to an amazing guy and we have been seeing each other for four months now. He called me a month or so ago and told me that he had totaled his new car but he was fine. Part of me had wanted to rush to his house to see him but then I looked over to see an amazing guy sitting next to me. I didn’t run to be by his side like I always had. But I did tell him that he could call me and we would set up a date later in the week. His birthday came and I called him to say hi and the first thing he said to me was “ where is my birthday cake” I told him that he had always complained about it so I figured that he didn’t care for that and he said “that’s how this works, you make me a cake…I complain and take it anyways and you just keep making them that’s how it works” That was the first time I had told him no and it took 12 years to do it but when you are there for someone through the good and the bad and they cant be there for you when you need them most it makes you see how truly they appreciate your friendship. I still love him with everything I am and I suppose I always will but I can’t keep wasting my time on someone who doesn’t love me or at least doesn’t want to show anyone that he loves me. I took my heart back and now I have someone who loves me and I love him. He tells me every day how much I mean to him and soon he will be stationed in the NAVY and eventually, years from now, we will get married and start a family and I will always be the one that got away.
I met my first love in 6th grade. We live in a small town so we were in all the same classes and had lunch together. I quickly fell head over heels for him and decided then that I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. Of course 12 year old boys aren’t interested in anything other then Pokémon and Brittany Spears. And all he talked about was joining the Marines and following in his big brothers footsteps. So I had to settle for being his best friend. We continued to be best friends all through high school but sophomore year I wanted more then friendship so I asked him out of course he said no but I never gave up even after hearing “we are best friends, I don’t want to ruin that” a couple times I know in my heart that we were meant to be. I know what you’re thinking that it sounds like I’m obsessed but it wasn’t like every day that I was asking him it was like once maybe twice a year. And if you ever felt that way about someone you would do what ever it took to get him to see you that way too….. So I did everything I could. We would hang out a lot after school he would drive me home and it was the greatest we spent a lot of time together. I eventually got the nickname “Stalker” but it was only a joke. Every year for his birthday I would bake him a cake and he would always look at it like it was poisoned but he would take it anyway and when he was done he would tell me of how great it was…. Of course I knew that… I would spend all year baking trying to practice so his would be amazing and they always were! He was my best friend and I was madly in love with him, just as much as I had been in 6th grade. Every year for Halloween the wildlife park does a Haunted Tram Ride and it is great fun. My birthday is a week before Halloween and so on the day of my birthday he took me to the wildlife park, no to go on the tram ride, we walked around for hours talking and looking at the animals it was the greatest I was so happy. We were down in the underwater observation center looking at the manatees and after standing there in silence for what could have been two minutes he leaned down and kissed me. My dreams were coming true it was like the world had stopped in that single kiss. A few days later he took me to the tram ride and I hate scary things so I held on to him with my eyes closed most of the time and he had his arm around me keeping me safe…it was like he had finally realize that what I had been saying all those years was right. Of course nothing last forever so after about a week or so he wouldn’t return any of my phone calls and he would avoid me at school. I’m not stupid I know he was so I gave him his space…..he eventually started talking to me and saying you haven’t been stalking me lately what’s wrong… I would answer because I got the message so I was leaving you alone…. I played it cool but inside my heart was breaking. He had made my heart break so many times over the years from me loving him so much and not getting the feeling in return, but it never got easier. You would think that after all that I would give up… nope I still loved him just the same. A few years after graduation, yes we still spent a lot of time together but I was giving up hope. I started seeing someone new and got married. That was a big mistake! I had always know that but I felt that if I couldn’t have the one guy that held my heart I would leave it with him and move on with my life. The day of my wedding all I could think about was him and how I had hoped that he was going to be there. He wasn’t. He didn’t talk to me for about a year and one day I got a e-mail telling me that I needed to call him he wanted to talk to me… I was sitting having lunch with my husband when I got the e-mail and it was like he didn’t matter. My husband and I had been having a lot of trouble and he knew even before we were married on how I felt about him. I waited till that night to call him. He told me that his dad was very sick and that he wanted me to come see him at the local hospital. The next day I went. Not have seen him in over a year I was very anxious. I went up to the room wear his dad was and there he stood I knew that was the end. He still held my heart in his pocket. I said hello to the family and we went for a walk out to this courtyard area. I couldn’t help thinking how I had missed him and that past year was nothing but bad because I hadn’t had my best friend there. His brother and sister-in-law came from out of state with their two young boys. I finally got to meet his big brother, the one who he had always talked so great about. He was here on leave from the Marines he had been pulled from over seas to come see his dad. Through out the years being his best friend I grew close to his family and his family knew how I felt all those years. His dad would always say that I was his daughter-in-law and I called his mom mom as well. I saw myself still spending my last days with him at this point I was starting to give up but seeing him with those boys, one 4 and the other 6, I wanted that. I saw how great he was with them and in my opinion his family made beautiful babies and I wanted that… they stayed for a week or so and life went back to normal. A month after he had e-mailed me his dad had past away and it was hard to see my best friend in so much pain but I was glad that he wanted me to be there to comfort him. His brother, sister-in-law and nephews were staying at his moms house and after a few drinks his mom and sister-in-law got into it. I was there when his brother started going off at the mouth and of course he said something about me and how I should be with my husband and not spending so much time over at his house. Of course he didn’t care about what he was saying even though I had sent my husband packing and was working on divorce papers (the divorce had nothing to do with my best friend) so when his brother sobered up and tried to give me some sad apology and said you don’t have to accept it its up to you I told him that he needed to know the whole story before he ran his mouth and talked about someone he had no idea what the story was and I walked away. His brother went back over seas and his sister-in-law and nephews went back home and every thing went back to normal here at home. I was moving into a new apartment and my best friend helped. That night things went further then a kiss and after all that it was not like I had dreamed. I think at that point I think I had hit the lowest heartbreak yet. Well that’s what I thought. During my divorce process it was hard hearing the things going around town. My best friend worked with my soon to be ex’s brother and words were said. If the words that were told to me were true or not, I don’t know but they were not nice at all. So I started to avoid talking to anyone but that didn’t stop it finally I talked to my friends mom and she told me that he had said that until everything was finalized between my ex and I he was trying not to talk to me because it was causing a lot of trouble. I started talking to an amazing guy and we have been seeing each other for four months now. He called me a month or so ago and told me that he had totaled his new car but he was fine. Part of me had wanted to rush to his house to see him but then I looked over to see an amazing guy sitting next to me. I didn’t run to be by his side like I always had. But I did tell him that he could call me and we would set up a date later in the week. His birthday came and I called him to say hi and the first thing he said to me was “ where is my birthday cake” I told him that he had always complained about it so I figured that he didn’t care for that and he said “that’s how this works, you make me a cake…I complain and take it anyways and you just keep making them that’s how it works” That was the first time I had told him no and it took 12 years to do it but when you are there for someone through the good and the bad and they cant be there for you when you need them most it makes you see how truly they appreciate your friendship. I still love him with everything I am and I suppose I always will but I can’t keep wasting my time on someone who doesn’t love me or at least doesn’t want to show anyone that he loves me. I took my heart back and now I have someone who loves me and I love him. He tells me every day how much I mean to him and soon he will be stationed in the NAVY and eventually, years from now, we will get married and start a family and I will always be the one that got away.