I Didn't Love Him Yet

I always promised myself that I would wait until I got out of high school.  Sure, I bitched about it like all of my friends did, and told my best friend how much I wanted to lose my virginity when we were seniors and she lost hers, but really, I always intended to wait until after high school.  I have no idea why, but that's what I had told myself.

So in august, about three months after my graduation, I had been dating a boy for four weeks.  One night we were making out in his car, and I said, "Screw it.  This is it."  It was my first time, and he knew it.  It wasn't his.  After extremely pressuring him into it, I lost my virginity that night in the back of his Jeep.  I didn't love him then.

That was almost two months ago. 

Somewhere between then and now, I fell for him, and I fell hard.  I've never said it about any guy I've ever dated before, but I'm in love with that boy.

Most people have a terrible first time, but mine was better than I ever thought it was going to be.
bvernon bvernon
18-21, F
3 Responses Oct 17, 2011

Don't worry about that. Love comes unplanned and unexpectedly and if you don't live for the moment then what do you have to live for. Nothing.

"Unfortunately, since you had sex after four weeks in a car, he is not likely to take you seriously."<br />
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That's total BS. Just say'n. Guys aren't that complicated. If there's good chemistry, then there's good chemistry. At what point in the relationship you start having sex has nothing to do with it (despite what Cosmo might tell you). <br />
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Even if there was.. since when is 4 weeks not long enough to wait? My girlfriend was happy she made it to the second date.. and I'm crazy about her. =)

hehehe well said! and your story sounds a lot like my story with my boyfriend.

Wow, really? I'd like to point out that you really don't know too much about the situation. He's actually quite serious about me... More serious than I probably am about him. He was the one that was pushing this whole "aura of importance" business that you're talking about. I think the first time we had sex probably meant more to him than to me.<br />
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By no means am I saying that he's the one or that it will last forever or anything. We're young, I know. I'm not trying to be ridiculous and say, "OMFG MY FIRST TIME WAS PERFECT AND SO ROMANTIC."<br />
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But it was a far cry better than most people that I know.