Bittersweet Memories

I remember when life was simple, a childhood not tainted.
Daisy chains and big trees to climb, mother's cooking streaming through open windows tantalising my sense of smell.
I remember when I laughed with my belly, playing tag with my siblings.
Garden full with ripe vegetables and smiles of my parents watching over their young giggle and run about.
I remember when the beach was just a jog away, salty taste of sand on my lips. Diving into the unknown, swimming amongst the daydreams of a little girl wanting to be a mermaid.
I remember when father took us on forever lasting trips in our trusty car, radio full blast with old classics.
Visiting the endless family who invited us into their homes and the many awesome memories of family vacations.

I remember when mother died and my childhood disappeared.
The child in me vanishing and the head of house now cleaning and looking after the very siblings who are now to be my charges.
I remember kissing my mother in her coffin, for the last time looking at her lifeless face.
The tears stung like bee stings, my mind of child not comprehending that I will never see her again.
I remember when I was taken away, not knowing that I had another family.
The torture of being ripped away, leaving my comforts for something unknown.
I remember how I felt hate for the first time, the gloom of depression.
A blade of a knife, as I cut at myself to ease the pain.
I remember feeling alone, seeing life in another way.
Experiencing another dynamic so traumatic, all I could do was survive.

I remember this, because I have too.
I live everyday remembering I am still here because I was born to tell this story.
DarkHeartLove DarkHeartLove
26-30, F
Nov 26, 2012