Degrading

I am a larger women so naturally I draw attention from those who like bigger women. I have not had many positive experiences with this. I know that not every guy out there who like big ladies has a fetish... but I seem to have no luck finding them.

For those who are unaware there are people who like fat. The problem I have had is that the "Fat" is more important than I am. I can not count the times that I have been asked to gain weight! GAIN! and not just a few pounds either. One person requested that I eventually weigh 600 pounds. That is more than double my weight.

I think asking someone to do that just shows a total disregard for the other persons health and well being.

Years ago, the very first boy i was some what intimate with said he would ONLY date me if I gained some weight. I didn't of course.  I feel like with every "romantic" relationship I come close to.. i am constantly being prepped or manipulated into gaining for these guys.

There are so many reasons why this bothers me. By asking me to CHANGE for you makes me think that I am not good enough. I'm sure if i ever did do the gaining(god help me) I would still not be enough. I don't even want to get into the health aspect.
Tacit Tacit
22-25, F
6 Responses Jul 20, 2010

you don't need to change yourself for others to like you :)... if you need someone to talk to i'm here... :) I'm just a newbie on this site so I hope I can find true people with good intention in having friends ...

Bravo to you. I am a person who has a hard time getting people to like me the way I am, so I kind of know what you are talking about. We need to learn how to pick out people who like us for what we are inside, more than the outsde. Good luck to you, and keep your values strong.

I do know the difference. Its fine to like whatever you want to like, but not ok to try to mold and change someone to fit into that role.<br />
lol i have no idea what they would do..

Here's hoping you realize the difference between "creepy douchebag fat fetishist" and "guy whose tastes happen to skew towards the voluptuous."<br />
<br />
Of course, if you REALLY want to mess with a fat fetishist's head, just tell him that you're actually a method actress wearing a fat suit to do research for a role.

Thank you very much! I am so glad I have realized I shouldn't have to change for anyone. I just don't understand some people.. I can't imagine asking someone to change so much of themselves for me!

I wasn't even aware of such a fetish until I read some stories here. It is the most frustrating thing to not be accepted for yourself, as you are. I never understand why they never think we're not good enough. It never occurs to them that they may be the ones lacking. Fortunately, you've learned this lesson at a young age. I'm happy for you that you refuse to be manipulated or forced into being someone you're not just to please a man.