I Respect Boundaries
I set myself boundaries towards other people, it benefits me greatly.
It is not about what they want or their boundaries, but my boundaries towards them, what I need to get ahead.
As a kid I had no understanding of another's boundaries, always gave my full heart and devoted attention to the people I cared for and always got hurt, why is that after all I have done? Because I didn't have any set of my own boundaries to loving people, I just loved them unconditionally - my biggest mistake ever made; always ending up disappointed and sad... I know unconditional Love means giving without expecting anything back, but that is how I loved and I only demanded a little respect but they all treated me like shiiiit.
So upon knowing the true nature of humans, I have learned to never fully trust any one of them, some didn't even deserve the Love and kindness I gave them, and my time and energy... Thank God I am not the messiah or some other saint obliged to be kind and loving towards everyone, even criminals...that relieves me of any such obligation, since I know I can never be as perfect as Jesus was in loving (if he ever existed).
I don't have to Love everyone, since that would be simply impossible...rather I don't set myself up against some saint like scale, or God would hold me responsible for not fulfilling it... I know I cannot fulfil it, so why fool myself in thinking I can be that great at loving? And frankly I don't want to love people any more, they all have problems and are capable to hurt others.
I know the Bible says "you should all aspire to be like Christ"...but that is simply impossible to ever achieve, since not only have I a great hatred for humanity being the disgrace they are to God, but also because I know I can never measure up to that perfection so why kill myself while trying?
They say when you don't open your heart you lose a piece of yourself - I beg to differ, you lose it when you open it up to others...especially to people who don't deserve it, trampling over that piece of treasure!!!
It is not about what they want or their boundaries, but my boundaries towards them, what I need to get ahead.
As a kid I had no understanding of another's boundaries, always gave my full heart and devoted attention to the people I cared for and always got hurt, why is that after all I have done? Because I didn't have any set of my own boundaries to loving people, I just loved them unconditionally - my biggest mistake ever made; always ending up disappointed and sad... I know unconditional Love means giving without expecting anything back, but that is how I loved and I only demanded a little respect but they all treated me like shiiiit.
So upon knowing the true nature of humans, I have learned to never fully trust any one of them, some didn't even deserve the Love and kindness I gave them, and my time and energy... Thank God I am not the messiah or some other saint obliged to be kind and loving towards everyone, even criminals...that relieves me of any such obligation, since I know I can never be as perfect as Jesus was in loving (if he ever existed).
I don't have to Love everyone, since that would be simply impossible...rather I don't set myself up against some saint like scale, or God would hold me responsible for not fulfilling it... I know I cannot fulfil it, so why fool myself in thinking I can be that great at loving? And frankly I don't want to love people any more, they all have problems and are capable to hurt others.
I know the Bible says "you should all aspire to be like Christ"...but that is simply impossible to ever achieve, since not only have I a great hatred for humanity being the disgrace they are to God, but also because I know I can never measure up to that perfection so why kill myself while trying?
They say when you don't open your heart you lose a piece of yourself - I beg to differ, you lose it when you open it up to others...especially to people who don't deserve it, trampling over that piece of treasure!!!