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I Think My Cyber Relationship Is Getting Real! And I Am Falling In Love....

I am a 22-year old Asian girl who is fond of Social Networking Sites. I had a boyfriend for years and after so many months of misunderstandings, we finally broke up. It was really such a depressing breakup and i am working out for that depression for months.

Until one day, i opened one of my social networking account and i found a private message from this certain European guy. Let me call him Kyle. He's a year older than me. He said "hi, sophie". I found that i also had a friend request from him. I found him really cute on his pictures that's why i accepted him and i replied on his message. He replied back in an instant and from there, our conversation started. That same day, he asked me if i want to be his girlfriend. Coming from a breakup, i thought of giving into this "little fun" as i r thought that this was just a simple "flirting" on chat as a pastime on that night and this will just happen once. Yes, he was already my new boyfriend that same night... that one night of chat. After hours of chatting, i finally said goodbye as i wanted to take a rest already. He asked me to stay a few minutes for awhile. I asked him why. He told me we just have to agree on our "schedule" first. I found out and thought that this guy might have really liked me. I told him that my being online is irregular and i am not sure if i will be on tomorrow. He just said that i'll just try to send him offline message on his PM so that he'll know what i do, where am i, etc. That same night he told me that he IS serious about me and if he's not, he won't be spending that long night talking with me. He even told me that he means everything he said and he is serious about coming here in our country to meet me! I don't wanna believe fast... and i just played along.

The next night... i got curious. I opened that Social Networking site and found him again. And we chat again. He asked me my messenger because of course, communicating thru messenger is much more easier and convenient. Then, we talked long hours AGAIN.

The next days, i signed online on my phone and there, we continued to chat. That night after we talked, I was already thinking. I asked myself, "what is this?" "is this real?" For him, what we have is a true relationship. For me, i just want to ride along with everything happening to us 'coz i am enjoying it. I enjoy the appreciation.... i'm loving the attention. He sends me offline message informing me of what he does. Later on, i do what he does as well. He is only available during the weekends because he is working during the days. He can't possibly spend long hours of chatting during the weekdays when he have work as he only goes to a computer shop to talk to me. He is and art teacher. It compliments my schedule as well coz i am still studying and working part-time as well. So our chat schedule is only during the weekends.

2 weeks after being a couple, we had our first live chat! My little attraction to him grew. I know he feels the same way too. We talked for 6 hours! And by hearing his voice... I started to become confused already. Coz what i thought at the start as such a simple chat flirting only, i feel is becoming real. No, this is not flirting anymore i told myself. For Kyle, this is not flirting as well. Or maybe he thought of flirting at the start too, but then as we go along, this "online relationship" is becoming a "real relationship" already. And our communication continues. During the weekdays, we send each other offline messages and tell stories of what we do. Kyle is a very sweet guy. Though we are not physically together, it is only from him that i got this kind of care and appreciation i never experienced from my past relationship. He listens every time, and my every word is important to him. Like when i talk about courtship that is a culture here in country wherein a guy should pursue a girl he wants before he could get her... he even asked me to write it coz for him, it is very important for him to know about it.

He never fails to meet me online. We are of different time zones, and we both try to meet on our agreed time schedule of the day. He kept on assuring me that everything about us is real, and if only i should trust him completely and we continue to be company even as online as for the moment, he's gonna commit really. Most of the time, he doesn't need to assure me, coz by his words, i feel his sincerity.

The problem is, we needed to wait 2 more years before he can go here in my country. He needs to save money for his expenses for coming here, and aside from that, wait as well for his friend to finish college and after that his friend will work as well and save money too, coz it was already their initial plan of really going here in the first place. And now, he said his aim is to save money for him to be able to go here.

Aside from the excitement that we are feeling now, I'm kinda scared because i am not sure if relationships that started from the cyber environment really gets real. Right now, i've already started to invest real feelings for him already and i'm sure he as well coz i feel it from him. I just want to know if THIS is really possible. I would like to know if online relationships on some people really gets real...
sophie0318 sophie0318 22-25, F 9 Responses Oct 11, 2011

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dont confuse lust with love...love itself is nothing
there is always a thing attached to person that u love
mostly its lust...accept it sexy :)

Long distance relationships can work, they are just a lot of maintenance and you both need to be committed. Acts of disrespect can ruin it. Putting it too low on your list of priorities can ruin it also, or at the very least cause hurt feelings.<br />
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Those who are able to keep this type of relationship are usually rewarded with an amazing connection once they are together! I hope it works for you. :)<br />
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I am in the middle of something like this right now. We have met irl once and it was amazing. We have a few years to wait before we can be together, so we are trying our best to keep things going. Everything is great so far! We love to make each other happy, and are honest about the ups and down of our lives. The relationship began as primarily dirty talk/cyber and slowly evolved into an amazing connection. We still indulge in sexual conversation, but it's not how we spend the majority of our time. We have many facets to our friendship now, and I love it. He is the love of my life <3

Wow ive been there and let me give you some good advice ok: Live your life here and now because before you know you will have lost it and LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS DONT WORK!!!! im sorry i had to be harsh but its the truth. add please if youre not too upset

Actually I know someone who met online , after three years time they moved together

thanks for your warnings. i just do hope this is not a scam. until now for up to this moment, he hasn't asked me money.

Yes, this should be a scam. Get yourself out from this guys ploys. Before it's too late. DON'T SEND MONEY ! !

Yes this could be a scam. <br />
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It has some of the indications. 1. Start relationship. 2. Get you hooked. 3. Develop your hopes and dreams. 4. A problem or travel issue develops - and he needs money to help fix the situation / travel. <br />
5. (if you send money) - He asks for more because the problem has become more difficult. <br />
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Also. DON'T travel to see him. Whilst it seems crazy, becoming a sex slave in a foreign country is something you really want to avoid. <br />
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BEWARE. Don't send any money. <br />
BEWARE. Scammers are very very good at what they do. They do it professionally. They know the tricks, and stories that get you interested and those that make you feel guilty. <br />
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Here is an idea. If he ever asks you for money - say you just bought a car and need some help with it. Ask him to send some money. ;) <br />
Perhaps you should just enjoy the attention he is giving you. And get on and find a Real bf.

Careful!!! When he ask you for money to help him travel or to pay for some expenses he is incurring. It's a scam!!! There are expert troller out there feeding on the vulnerables. Hoped your relationship is real and I'm wrong. They are expert at what they do best. Feed on the innocent. <br />
Just remember this, if they don't have money, why aren't they out there working to make money instead of being online constantly looking for money? Good Luck!!! Be safe!!! There are predators out there preying on the innocents.

just believe in what your heart is telling, sometimes it is good not to think and worry- but follow where your heart is...and if one day you feel it is not good anymore follow where your mind dictates...maybe it is just me but i still believe heart over rules the mind..because it is where you'll find the happiness and the sense of being right.