America's Next Great Civil Rights Fight: Equality For the Rich

Just as there will always be bad things that happen to good people there will always be a need for civil rights for some group.

America's Next Great Civil Rights Fight: Equality for the Rich
By John Lillpop on (Feb 27, 09)


Satire by Lillpop
Throughout the ages, America has opened her arms and made room for a diverse mix of people and circumstances. We have overcome prejudices against women, African-Americans, Hispanics, and other racial minorities…

Our big tent has expanded to include gays and lesbians, transvestites, the handicapped, the blind, the stupid (Mostly liberals), Muslims, Buddhists, atheists, agnostics, Jews, Hindus, and other religious minorities.

America has embraced “ Our diversity is our greatest strength” as the national slogan in our multicultural potpourri of insufferable tolerance and political correctness gone amuck.

Despite all of the social “progress” that has blessed this land, there is one class of people, despised like none other, for whom the bells of tolerance and acceptance have yet to toll.

That, would be the rich, the most abused, maligned, misunderstood, and persecuted minority in human history.

Being rich is such a wretched offense that, in and of itself, it can mitigate the social advantages that would normally accrue to those who are in one or more of the “protected” categories.

For example, a blind and deaf, non-English speaking, pregnant, lesbian, Hispanic illegal alien who suffers from chronic alcoholism and drug addiction, and who is a practicing Muslim terrorist specializing in IEDs, would normally be a favorite daughter to ACLU and La Raza lawyers, government bureaucrats, and liberal politicians looking for a victim to exploit for cheap political gain.

However, let that same miserable urchin have more than $1,000 in the bank, and be in possession of an automobile more snazzy than a 1990 Saturn with 300,000 miles on it, and you have a veritable Untouchable on your hands.

According to liberals, being rich is one of the most unpatriotic and un-American offenses that one can commit, nearly as unforgivable as blasphemy against the Holy Ghost.

Unless, that is, one’s name happens to be Obama, Pelosi, Kennedy, Gore, Rockefeller, Bloomberg, Clinton, Soros, Winfrey, or any number of rich liberals whom are immune from the type of wealth-based character flaws that doom conservatives.

When you think about it, though, the rich should pay LESS, not more, taxes than the rest of us.

After all, the rich do not use public schools, opting instead to send their children to private schools.

The rich do not collect food stamps, welfare payments, disability checks, or unemployment perks.

The rich do not depend on the U.S. military to educate, feed, and house their children, preferring instead to send their kids to Yale, Harvard, Stanford, or Princeton.

The rich do not urinate in public and make pests of themselves outside Home Depot stores while waiting for a $5.00 “job opportunity” to appear.

The rich do not rely on public defenders to work their way out from under silly scrapes with the law.

The rich do not send their pregnant, unmarried daughters to Planned Parenthood or other public infanticide outlets, preferring instead to whisk their ‘child with child’ off to a castle nestled discreetly in the Swiss Alps where the whole sordid affair can be handled with dignity and sans unwanted attention.

Only a morally bankrupt institution, like the Democrat Party for example, would consider it acceptable to force people who use the least services to pay the most taxes!

This gross injustice must not stand. The American sense of fairness and equality demands that the yoke of discrimination not burden those, who through no fault of their own, are rich.

We must pass a constitutional amendment to extend the protection and dignity of equality to the most vulnerable minority in our society--the filthy rich.


John W. Lillpop is a Capitol Hill Coffee House staff writer.


Grits4life Grits4life
46-50, F
4 Responses Feb 27, 2009

You meant it as satire, but it's actually true.<br />
And actually atheists spend plenty of time viciously reviling anyone who dares to believe in G-d.


No, the last minority that its ok to publicly revile is atheists such as myself. <br />
<br />
The story does have the amusing side effect of illustrating where the republican loyalties actually lie.

grits,<br />
Friggin' hilarious! Great post!!!<br />
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