... and I Enjoy It.I hurt myself, and I have no intention of stopping either. I used to wish I could stop - but that's when I thought I had a problem. What I do is no worse than smoking or drinking. SI won't give me cancer, it won't rot my liver, it won't paralyze me or give me a horrible STD. As far as I'm concerned, it's one of the safest ways to physically cope with an emotional problem. I love my scars, they are a part of who I am.
Edit: Just as an update, for those who had any interest in my story... I still stand to it, every word. I was not suicidal, and was very careful/hygienic, having a background in first aid I never put myself in any danger. I have since stopped hurting myself. I can't say the need ran dry, but a very special person in my life does not deserve to deal with everything that comes along with self-injury. He helps me deal with it, and after getting rid of all of my SI paraphernalia years ago, I haven't hurt myself since. It helped me deal with a lot of bad stuff at the time, and my scars are proof that I made it through alive and safe, when I could have otherwise turned to drugs or other dangerous activities.
If you harm yourself, you don't have to feel guilty about it. I can tell you that it gets better, but seek help! Get the attention you need, confide in a friend, or make a pact with someone you trust. We both know you don't really want to kill yourself, or you'd have done it by now. Always take care of your wounds, and if you aren't willing to take care of your injuries, you may be suffering in ways that self-injury can't help.
slowrewind 21-25, F 10 Responses 11 May 6, 2007