Difficult To Fathom

I was your stereotypical middle class man, good job, earning nearly 30k a year, good homelife, missus i loved 4 cats, house the lot.

Don't know when it started but i remember taking a filleting knife out and just " scratching"

next thing i know it escalated to my exgf finding me covered in blood sitting on the doorstep.

will always remember going away from hospital and the nurse turned around and said "we will see you again"

sure enough i was back the following day.

Therapy, anti depressants etc the works.

Two suicide attempts later and something clicked.

I still hate myself, but I don't hurt myself anymore.

My arms are horifically scarred forever, i will never be rid of it, but there is a way forward.

tonto1 tonto1
26-30, M
1 Response Mar 13, 2010

good that u found a way to stop,its nice to hear someone that did.Me,i think the only way ill stop is when im dead