Not Good Enough

I'm always thinking this world is not mine, i'm not good enough, not good at all. I hate my body, I hate myself so hard it hurts. i can't keep myself from cutting cause it makes me feel alive and I'm always telling myself I don't deserve happiness.

I really don't know why I've got friends, 'cause honestly I just can't be loved. I feel invisible even if i have a family and people around me. I feel like my friends talk to me just when they need me, and it feels horrible. always wondering why I got to born and constantly having thoughts like "I wanna die right now" or "If only I could die in a accident".

The reality is I need help. I just refused to tell myself yet.




Please.