No Shame At All And Actually Quite Proud ^_^

Yes, I'm nineteen years old and I still sleep with my teddy bear, he is my best friend and has been my partner in crime for almost two decades now.

I got him for Christmas when I was one, maybe two years old, by that time I had a lot of teddy bears, beautiful ones, specially decorated ones, he wasn’t very special, a classic brown teddy bear with a little red ribbon tied around his neck, but there was something about him that was special to me, incredibly special, we bonded right away. I cuddled with him every night and found comfort and safety in him, like everything would be alright as long as I had him.

When I was frightened I took him to school one day and was automatically made fun of by jerks on the bus, but for some reason they didn’t scar me near as bad as the jerks in jr high, not by a long shot, and the jr high jerks didn’t make fun of me because of him. I was always able to look away when they made fun of me for teddy but when I stopped bringing him to school the bullies who made fun of me for other things really hurt. But that’s another story

I remember this one particular day my family and I were visiting relatives that were pretty far away from where we lived and of course I brought teddy because I dared not go anywhere without him. It was pretty fun because we both played together with my nephew and step-cousins and it was a great night, as we were driving home I was trying to think of an excuse to stay longer, but then halfway home I realized the true horrifying reason we had to go back…we forgot teddy!

I’ve never felt so panicked at a young age! But we were halfway home and mom and dad refused to go back for him, our relatives would be coming around our neighborhood halfway through the week and they could bring him, but I couldn’t last that long, I bawled hysterically every night he was missing, like my world would entirely come crashing down if anything ever happened to him, my best friend and life partner. I was so grateful when I finally got him back, I hugged and squeezed him all the way home refusing to let go.

As I got older, Mom was always trying to find a way to separate us a little like trying to make me grow out of him faster, I would always love him no matter what, and I admit it, on the first day of school I always snuck him in my backpack for good luck, but would then leave him home for the rest of the year. I did begin to leave him behind in the bedroom more, but he was always there where I left him, I wouldn’t even allow anyone to touch him unless I was supervising. He sure put up enough with me though, he’s had a lot of rips and tears and nowadays his fur’s falling out, but it doesn’t matter, he’s mine and I’ll always love him.

But I remember this one particular time after we moved, we were going back to our home town for just one night, and as I was packing I decided not to bring teddy as it was just one night, my mom had this look of pride on her face and said “You’re growing up” I just rolled my eyes just because I decide to go one night without my teddy doesn’t mean I’m changing or growing up any faster, I mean it’s not like I act like a big baby every time I’m around him.

But anyways, that trip to our hometown, turned out to be the worst trip ever, the best friend I was supposed to see and whom I’d been planning to see for months was taken away by his selfish mother who knew we had been planning this, but snatched him away anyways, I cried to bad when we got to the place we were staying and this time teddy wasn’t there! That made everything ten times worse! From that day on I never went anywhere without him, even if we were staying out of town for one night, nope! I’m never leaving him behind again.

My mom still thinks it’s baby-ish for me to take him everywhere including on vacations even though he just sits in the bedroom all day, but at this point I’ve learned to stop caring about what she and everyone thinks, he’s a part of who I am, and to people who don’t get it or like it, I’m sorry, deal with it. I’m not giving up my best friend for anything ^_^
IHaveASadSecret IHaveASadSecret
18-21, F
2 Responses May 23, 2012

Teddy bears are awesome!

I know right! XD

Awww!!!! That's really sweet!!! ^_^