No Love

I truly believe that the reason that I started sleeping with people that I felt nothing for, is because I was raped at the age of 13 and I lost viginity to a rapist. I felt so dirty after it happened to me, I wanted to find someone that would make me feel like I was special to them. Find someone that I would of given my virginity to if it was taken from. I went the wrong way about it, but I did find that person it took me a long time. By the time I was 15 I had slept with over 30 people. I was careful though I went to the health unit every 3 months to test myself for STDs. I really didnt care if I had got one or not, but I didnt want to pass it to someone else. After a while I was addicted to sex, I loved the way it made me feel, I didnt care who it was with. I was addicted to it. I still am I have to have some sort of sex at least 5 times a week. All I ever wanted was to feel love when I had sex with someone.
imperfectbeauty imperfectbeauty
18-21, F
4 Responses Apr 5, 2012

This sound wierd but your addiction is like my addiction to bikinis

Addiction wouldn't be the word here, I'm sorry but I would say you are victim of a horrible incident and it affected you mentally. Everyone does what they want, and we all know if it's okay or not. I'm just hoping you don't get anything bad out of it, because dont get me wrong! Sex is amazing! It can be even better when it's with someone you love, so honestly if I were you, I'd stay committed to a **** buddy until you realize how many babies you could've had by now. Because it can honestly make one sick.. I never want to see another girl get around. That's sad :/ I'll pray even tho I don't even pray for myself

friend stop it, std are very bad and some are not curable, use cond..oms to be safe, and think about our future you have long life to live, dont waste your life like this, <br />
keep yourself engaged in some sort of good work such that you will forget this sex urge.<br />
control yourself

Well, im sorry the reason you started having sex..but there's nothing wrong with enjoying your self. ;)