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But They Think I'm An Alien

Posted February 11th, 2008 at 9:26AM

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  1. trixi - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by trixi on Feb 11th, 2008 at 3:39PM

    yeah, probably so. thanx

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  2. Posted by An EP User on Feb 11th, 2008 at 7:30PM

    I think Cosmo must be right. I always expect people to smile back and they almost always do:)

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  3. trixi - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by trixi on Feb 11th, 2008 at 8:17PM

    where are you from? i'm from rural MD and some people here are pretty wrapped up in themselves.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  4. Posted by An EP User on Feb 11th, 2008 at 9:09PM

    I'm from just north of you, also a rural area. I know you're going to think I'm crazy, Kamisgirl, but I do believe that our expectations play a part in what actually happens.And, it might not happen the first time, or the second, but over time, it will.---I almost always get the green light and a great parking spot, too. I'm not being flippant with you. I just expect it to happen:)

    Reply | 3dislike | Flag

  5. Lollipop63 - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by Lollipop63 on Jul 8th, 2008 at 6:28PM

    I love to smile at ppl even if I don't know them. It just gives me a warm feeling inside to know that a smile can make a person's day. Even if the person doesn't smile back I always greet ppl because that's just the way I'am. If a smile could say a thousand words than I have said a million words in a day.

    Reply | 7dislike | Flag

  6. soulfireRW - 31-35 years old

    Posted by soulfireRW on Jul 9th, 2008 at 3:43PM

    When I was a kid I made a game of smiling. I would try to see how many people I could get to smile with my smile.

    Many people are very wrapped up in their own mind that they do not even see you sharing your love with the world.

    Many people believe a stranger smiling at them means the stranger wants something from them. That is why you get the weird looks.

    Never stop smiling, because you are sharing your love with the world and that is a precious and beautiful gift you are willing to give. You never know who's life you may change that day even if you don't get to see the results.

    Smiles, Light and Love - RavenWolf

    Reply | 8dislike | Flag

  7. Igwig - 16-17 years old - female

    Posted by Igwig on Jul 10th, 2008 at 10:23AM

    Tell me about it! I always smile to people on the street, but when they give you a filthy look back or ignore you entirely, you just stop trying. It's sad how unfriendly we all are nowadays - when I hold open doors for people, they completely ignore me too! It might sound old-fashioned, but it is quite irritating when you're a nice girl, just standing there holding open the door and no one can even smile or say thankyou, let alone offer to take it for you! It's really worrying just how anti social we're all becoming.

    I will carry on smiling, in hope that I might improve somebodies day but it would be nice if once in a while, people weren't so damn rude....I want to be kind, and have hope that maybe they didn't smile back because they were having a bad day but at the same time, I don't want to be a fool :)

    Reply | 2dislike | Flag

  8. Igwig - 16-17 years old - female

    Posted by Igwig on Jul 10th, 2008 at 10:26AM

    Tell me about it! I always smile to people on the street, but when they give you a filthy look back or ignore you entirely, you just stop trying. It's sad how unfriendly we all are nowadays - when I hold open doors for people, they completely ignore me too! It might sound old-fashioned, but it is quite irritating when you're a nice girl, just standing there holding open the door and no one can even smile or say thankyou, let alone offer to take it for you! It's really worrying just how anti social we're all becoming.

    I will carry on smiling, in hope that I might improve somebodies day but it would be nice if once in a while, people weren't so damn rude....I want to be kind, and have hope that maybe they didn't smile back because they were having a bad day but at the same time, I don't want to be a fool :)

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  9. beowulf - 16-17 years old - male

    Posted by beowulf on Jul 10th, 2008 at 10:43AM

    I smile at randoms sometimes. It's all part of the perpetual, complex dance of human eye contact and body language. One smile says "warm and friendly", another says "sleazy old man". Once you become a Jedi Master of smiling, you will rule the world. sort of.

    Reply | 6dislike | Flag

  10. nalnocoj - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by nalnocoj on Jul 10th, 2008 at 2:44PM

    my motto in life is 'if you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours,.
    I get the strangest looks but I always smile at everyone who's eyes I meet. Its a lovely feeling to be able to walk around smiling and genuinely mean it.

    Reply | 4dislike | Flag

  11. Ms49yrs - 51-55 years old - female

    Posted by Ms49yrs on Jul 10th, 2008 at 5:42PM

    Hi Trixi- I'm from Md also but my mom was from South Carolina where EVERYONE said Good Morning, Afternoon or Evening no matter what the age, so I always do too. Some people have never had that consideration in their life and I get looks from-Are you a mental patient- to-Are you looking at my husband!. LOL Be yourself-you know a smile can sometimes turn the lonliest person's terrible day into a moment of hope that wasn't there previously and to pass goodness to another is a precious thing-keep doing it. Goodness needs all the help it can get!

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  12. Arlena - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by Arlena on Jul 10th, 2008 at 5:58PM

    I'm really glad I'm not the only person that smiles at strangers! I think I picked it up from my mama - she's in her late 60s now, and it seems to me that people in her generation are much more likely to smile back at me than younger ones. Just an observation. I think a lot of people these days are too busy to even register that the smile is even directed at them - sad, really.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  13. Zinniqe - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by Zinniqe on Jul 10th, 2008 at 9:24PM

    I only smile to small kids.
    They don't think I'm weired,though some may shy,a lot of them would smile back,for they might think I'm fun.
    try that~ignore those unfriendly and superficial adults.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  14. peacefulwarrior13 - 36-40 years old

    Posted by peacefulwarrior13 on Jul 10th, 2008 at 11:22PM

    Most of the time while waiting in line at the grocery store I notice who is in a hurry and impatient (most people). Most don't take the time to appreciate the moment, and experience every moment and all that is good. I make it a point to read the cashier's name tag and say "thank you Jane/John" and it shows them that I actually give a #%$*. I do enjoy saying hello to a stranger and have the ability to strike up a conversation with most anyone. I guess I appreciate life and all it's happenings. Wish more did.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  15. Levoneh - 56-60 years old

    Posted by Levoneh on Jul 10th, 2008 at 11:55PM

    I've had a related experience. When i'm in a store, if i smile at another customer, sometimes they assume i work there. (Does this mean their assumption is, "Who would smile for free?"!) They ask me, "Where can i find...?" i say, "Well, i don't work here, but--" and they say, "Oh, excuse me, i don't know why i thought you did." I can't say i agree with the "expectation" responses; i started out expecting people to smile back. I do agree the size of the town makes a difference, though.

    Reply | 2dislike | Flag

  16. rmac - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by rmac on Jul 11th, 2008 at 12:49AM

    i think it is great to be friendly. i often smile at people and even talk to them out of the blue. my daughter says it embaresses her - how can i do it. but i just do. I am friendly by nature. Sometime people are friendly back, sometimes they are rude. Does it really matter? To me No - i am who i am and i love being me.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  17. distendedsilvertrails - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by distendedsilvertrails on Jul 11th, 2008 at 2:28AM

    I wish there were more people like you, and lollipop63, and ravenwolf and igwig... in fact i think that there are a lot of people who believe in the inherent goodness of others and want to share a simple smile but society's conventions stop them. sometimes i try to smile at people on the street and sometimes i dont, it depends on the place and the situation. but something feels off if i dont, the basic smile of acknowledgement that should be there but that is increasingly being eroded as societies become larger and more automatic and more unresponsive.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  18. SamEsRaraAvis - 16-17 years old - female

    Posted by SamEsRaraAvis on Jul 11th, 2008 at 6:22AM

    The same thing happens to me. I was told that smiles are contagious but every morning when I ride my bike and smile at someone they look back like they think I am on drugs, but on the other hand some people smile back like they can't believe anyone noticed them at all and that in itself is worth continuing trying to spread it around.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  19. trinitrish - 26-30 years old

    Posted by trinitrish on Jul 11th, 2008 at 7:38AM

    Don't stop smiling! Most people would smile back but sometimes you do get the occasional WTF weirdos who's attitudes would make lemons look sweet.

    I love it when I get smiled at....and I also love to smile. Makes things around you so much brighter...even if you're having a bad day. So you know what...maybe of the 50 ppl you smile at for the day bet you atleast half will return the sunshine!

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  20. tyvm54601 - 46-50 years old - female

    Posted by tyvm54601 on Jul 11th, 2008 at 7:42AM

    I grew up in Chicago proper and Chicagoland, now live in the "big city" of 50k in semi rural WI...moving into the country (my dream). I smile and chat with almost everybody. Pitch in to pick up something they've dropped, laugh with the person behind the counter wherever I go. Heck, I greet the WalMart Greeter. If ppl think I'm 'weird' I'm glad I don't know about it. I would likely try more... but if this kept up...I'd withdraw too. This would be a darn shame...as one of my goals in life is to make others feel good, or happy...to bring a smile to others. Yes, it sounds very pollyanna... so sue me. lolol

    Smiling at all here and thanking you for your words.

    d-

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  21. trukeesey - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by trukeesey on Jul 11th, 2008 at 9:42AM

    Maryland is not known for open-heartedness. South of Mason-Dixon line is more open, but Maryland is an exception. WV is very open-hearted but they may not smile, they are not responsive. VA is more likely to respond.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  22. trukeesey - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by trukeesey on Jul 11th, 2008 at 9:43AM

    I forgot to mention "Northern VA" is not part of VA, psychologically.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  23. Devarreaux - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by Devarreaux on Jul 11th, 2008 at 12:03PM

    My Mom used to tell me to "always be friendly" so when I was young I just always smiled at people I didn't know. Well in 6th grade I smiled at a guy and he wouldn't leave me alone b/c he thought I liked him (as a bf). I didn't even know him, it was the first day of class, guess not many people smiled at him. It was flattering but also saddened me. I always try to smile at people, for the same reasons mentioned in the comments above. Sometimes I can't react quick enough and get my smile out there tho when I see someone smiling at me at the last minute. So that could also be a reason someone doesn't smile back, maybe they're in such deep thought that they aren't really "seeing" you when they look at you.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  24. backontrack - 31-35 years old - female

    Posted by backontrack on Jul 12th, 2008 at 3:48PM

    I say, keep smiling!!!! I bet all of those people needed the smile you gave more than you know, more than he or she even realized. I've received sincere smiles that have brightened my day, and I can still see some of them.... thanks to all who smile

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  25. KATINALEE34 - 31-35 years old

    Posted by KATINALEE34 on Jul 13th, 2008 at 2:33PM

    I do as well. Sometimes you get a positive response, sometimes they just stare blankly. I think people are afraid to be nice to one another these days. You keep on doing what you are doing.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  26. Atiana - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by Atiana on Jul 21st, 2008 at 4:45PM, last updated Jul 21st, 2008 at 4:48PM

    Hi!

    This resonates with me.

    I remember on my first day of University, my brother & I were walking from our Apartment to Campus, and the first piece of advice he gave me was 'don't smile at people'

    I found it strange, but apparently it causes unwanted attention from the wrong kinds of people sometimes.

    Now that I am out of University, I still do it... I smile at folks when I see them. It's most natural to me. I love when people smile at me, perfect strangers. What I do find strange, is if I smile at someone and they don't smile back... that seems unnatural (unless they think I'm giving off a weird vibe, which I don't think I do)... but like Cosmo said on one of the above comments, it depends on where you are...



    To end this comment, by the end of my first year of University, I was voted as the only year 1 person who knows SOO many ppl on campus. & the thing was, I didn't really know everyone, just my smiling personality allowed them to smile @ me and hail me out & stop to talk (so it worked out well after all)

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  27. Pathfinder111111 - 31-35 years old

    Posted by Pathfinder111111 on Jul 29th, 2008 at 12:47AM

    Yeah sometimes it has to do with them having a bad day which is the result of the environment they are in on that particular day and the course of events that led up to that moment. I think i've had my share of experience of what you just said but don't let anything stop you from continuing smiling or being open to showing love because i think were starting to realize the world is changing in the worst way and we have to get the message across to as many as we can to bring it back to the way it should be. There are certain things that will take time to change and some things that cause conflict like politics and religion we obviously can't change at present but it is a social paradox that we are torn between the way other people do things and the way we know and feel we should do them inside, also overcoming our fear of society is very important, i believe we should think and feel for ourselves with the openess to be considerate to others.
    : D

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  28. Pathfinder111111 - 31-35 years old

    Posted by Pathfinder111111 on Jul 29th, 2008 at 12:48AM

    Yeah sometimes it has to do with them having a bad day which is the result of the environment they are in on that particular day and the course of events that led up to that moment. I think i've had my share of experience of what you just said but don't let anything stop you from continuing smiling or being open to showing love because i think were starting to realize the world is changing in the worst way and we have to get the message across to as many as we can to bring it back to the way it should be. There are certain things that will take time to change and some things that cause conflict like politics and religion we obviously can't change at present but it is a social paradox that we are torn between the way other people do things and the way we know and feel we should do them inside, also overcoming our fear of society is very important, i believe we should think and feel for ourselves with the openess to be considerate to others.
    : D

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  29. Gennessee - 36-40 years old

    Posted by Gennessee on Aug 18th, 2008 at 1:22PM

    Cosmo is dead on, I've lived in five different cities in the past 10 years and I was shocked about the smiling thing. We lived in Austin for awhile and I got used to smiling, saying hi to strangers and getting great responses, we moved to Northern California and I was actually given dirty looks when I smiled at my neighbors. I stopped doing it in CA b/c the people made me feel so bad. I'm so glad we moved, we're in Georgia now and it's better, not as friendly as Austin but way better than CA.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  30. Josie06 - 56-60 years old - female

    Posted by Josie06 on Aug 18th, 2008 at 1:26PM

    Same here. Sometimes I thinks it's the part of town I'm in cause I do get smiles back. Other times I wonder what side of the trash can did they wake up on. Smiling is healthy, so I do it all the time.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

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