I Have Never Shared One Of My Stories With Anyone Till Now.

I want to be a writer. I have so many stories and characters running around in my head that I desperately want to share with the world. The problem is being extremely shy when it comes to sharing the things in my head, with the people around me. Here on this website I can be anonymous and that helps. I am going to share with you one of my stories and I would like feedback from people about it: the tone, style, characters, subject, ideas to make it better, anything. Do you think I could be a writer.

Erica's Prom Night

Erica sat on top of the picnic table on the patio behind her home. She stared off into the clear, full-moonlit
night sky, as she often did,contemplating life. The clean, fresh scent of an early summer rain shower, somewhere
off in the distance, filled the air. It seemed so ironic that the clarity of the night was in such stark contrast
to her feelings. She wished life did not make her feel so shameful,alienated, and scared.

Erica could see that the lights in the family room were still on as she sat there in the dark, just
outside of the beam of light filtering through the closed vertical blinds of the patio door. Erica
knew that her parents were still waiting up for her. She glanced back over at Rachel's house, her neighbor
and long time friend. There were no lights on at her house.

Gathering her courage, Erica inhaled deeply, trying to calm her nerves and telling herself that the time
had come. With one final, deep, chest-heaving breath, she exhaled, stood up and stepped down off the table,
her heels making a light click as they made contact with the brick surface of the patio.
She stood there for a moment looking down at her ,soft pink gown and bending over, she straightened her hose,
pausing for a moment to admire how beautiful her french-tipped toenails looked in the 2 inch open-toed strappy
heels she had borrowed from Rachel. She was so proud of how beautiful she looked tonight and for a moment
reflected on all of the fun she'd had. Taking a step towards the back door, she glanced back at Rachel's house
hoping for a last second reprieve, but the Governor was not calling.

Erica's head was held low, her stride slow and heart pounding for she dreaded what she was about to do. Yet,
no matter how hard she knew it was going to be, it was something that had to be done, she had to face her
parents, they had to know. She had been planning this moment for months and wasn't about to back out now.
Pausing with her hand held on the doorknob she once again looked back at Rachel's house, thinking,
'where are you', 'we were supposed to stay together', and you said 'you would watch over me tonight.' But
there, in the moonlight Rachel's dark house stood unmoving, uncaring, and lifeless. Erica was upset that
Rachel disappeared on her tonight of all nights, but more than that she was upset over the fact that she had
disappeared, period. It was not in Rachel's character to be thoughtless and uncaring and Erica worried that
something had happened to her, something awful.

Erica again took a deep breath, cleared her mind, told herself everything was going to be ok and stepped into
the kitchen, quietly shutting the door behind her. She knew that in mere moments her parents were going to be
upset with her, probably want to disown her, lock her away so that no one would have to know what an embarrassing
disgrace tothe family, she was.

Standing in the kitchen, shaking like a leaf, she knew her parents were sitting in the next room waiting for her.
She adjusted her hairbow, straightened her dress one final time, and glanced down at her perfectly manicured
nails, stalling. She heard the sound of the television go away, muted.

"How was the prom, dear?" her mother called to her.

"Alright." The prom had not been "everything" she had hoped, but she did not have any regrets, until now.

"Come in here and tell us all about it," her mother said.

She knew she was about to have their undivided attention, for there was no way they would be able to look
at the television once she stepped into the room. "Mom, Dad I've got something I need to tell you." Any
parent could hear the reluctance in the statement; they heard it many times over the years. "Mom, - I spilled
my milk," "Mom, Dad - I broke the lamp," "Mom, Dad - I wrecked the car." Could any words prepare them?

Heels clicking lightly on the hardwood floor, Erica stepped down the hall towards the
family room, through the doorway next to the television, and into the light.

With a slight gasp, her mom's jaw dropped, speechless and breathless. Her dad looked up, his eyes growing
large; face red with a very perplexed look upon it. Both her parents just sat there for a moment,
staring at her. They acted initially shocked and confused but not terribly horrified. Slowly they examined
her from head to toe, as she stood before them in silence.

Erica wore a tea length pink taffeta gown with thin, clear spaghetti straps. The bodice hugged her tightly
giving her the shape of a young woman several years older than her age if 16. She had on two inch open
toed, pink heels that color-matched to her gown and showed off her pretty French-tipped toenails. She was
wearing a mother of pearl necklace with faux-diamond earrings that projected brilliant flashes of reflected
light and a pink ice tennis bracelet. A touch of blush made her cheeks a soft pink, to match the pale pink
lipstick that highlighted her full lips. Her light pink, almost white, French tipped acrylics made
her fingers look oh so dainty and cute. She also carried a small pink and white sequined purse, tucked under
left arm. She wore a wig with hair much longer than her own,long brunette locks of ringlet curls that
fell to the middle of her back, just below her shoulder blades; her tanned skin glowing beautifully.

As she stood there shaking, pulse racing, heart pounding; tears started to swell in Erica's eyes. based on
their reactions, and given the circumstances, she knew her parents had to be extremely disappointed.
"I-I-I can explain."

"Where are the clothes you left here wearing?!?" dad asked.

"At Rachel's house," Erica stared down at the floor, unable to look him in the eye.

She had never intended to hurt her parents, wishing that they would never have to know, but it was the
senior prom, and she was not going to miss it; nor did want to go through the rest of her life with regret.
Her parents had always told her that she had to make every moment count because once that moment's gone you
can never go back. They told her; in an effort to keep her grades up, an earned 'C' is a recorded 'C', you
can't go back and change it. She understood what they were saying; you've only got one life; live in a way
you will never have to look back with regret wishing you had done things differently.

"Is that how you went to the prom?" her dad asked.

Erica's lower lip quivered, "Y-yes, yes sir."

Erica mind traced back over the events of the evening; remembering how she and Rachel had been planning
this night since January. She remembered how Rachel helped to transform her from the lonely, confused,
unhappy male; Eric, into the lovely, bubbly, happy Erica, standing here now. She thought back to that
Saturday at the mall when Rachel had spent the entire day modeling prom dresses for Eric and how she had
saved him from embarrassment by purchasing the clothes for him, as well. She thought about the small
collection of pantyhose, shaper, panties, bra, and one-piece swimsuit she had in her room, in a box hidden
in the back of the closet. Rachel had given Eric the denim skirt, and cute silk top hanging behind all the
boy clothes, in the same closet, along with her favorite pair of low rise flared-leg jeans with the pretty
little pink bows sewn along the seam of one leg.

She thought about the thrill Eric and Rachel both had had when they ordered the wig and breast forms from
the internet. She thought of the excitement of the day they arrived and the joy Eric felt the first time he
tried them on. She thought about all the times, practically every afternoon, when her parent's thought their
son was only studying science, history, and math at Rachel's house, and how, in reality, Susan was putting
him through a crash course in all things feminine; teaching him how to do his nails, apply make-up, walk in
heels, sit like a girl, carry himself and act completely feminine; basically everything a teenage girl knows
about looking, feeling, and being attractive and feminine.

She thought about the Saturday evenings, and how, with mom gone to her weekly wine socials at the country club
and dad on the golf course; she would spend all afternoon at Rachel's house, transforming into Erica and how
they would don short skirts or tight jeans, do each other's make-up and hair, then go out for a drive around
the other side of town, in Rachel' mom's convertible, stopping for burgers' at Johnny's; the spot where all
the cross town rival high school boys hung out ogling the females. She reminisced about that one 15 y/o boy,
Ryan, that had been taken with Erica and how he nervoulsy flirted with her, every time they went there, totally
unaware that Erica was really a guy underneath the illusion of the cute teenage girl he saw before him and how
this had made Eric feel totally at ease and comfortable as Erica.

She was jolted from her reminiscing by her father's voice. "So how did it go? Were there any problems or issues
tonight? Do you have any regrets for going dressed like?" her dad asked.

"It was lovely, and no, no daddy, I don't have any regrets."

Mom stood up and walked over to her son, and reaching out she took Erica's hands in hers. For a brief moment
she admired her son's pretty, feminine fingernails, the tiny little cubic zirconium "engagement" style
ring on her right ring finger and how dainty and feminine they made her son's hand's look; then she looked
Eric in the eyes with a single tear escaping the corner of her own.

"I'm disappointed, but not in you. No, I'm proud of you. Im proud that you had the courage to make the moment
count. Proud that you were courageous enough to do what your heart was telling you you had to do. No, the
disapointment is that you didnt confide in me earlier and as a result, I missed getting to be apart of your big
night. Prom is a big deal and you look very pretty and...I didn't have a hand in it. I missed getting to take
you shopping for a prom dress. I missed helping you pick out your jewelry. I missed everything It hurts that
you didn't feel you could talk to me" She started to cry and Erica's dad put his arm around mom and gave her
a comforting hug.

Erica was stupefied by her mother's statements. She was florred by her mom's reaction. This was something she had
never dreamed could happen. Now her mind was blank. Just moments ago, before entering the house, she had tried
to create all the arguments that her parents would have and the only counterargument she could think of; to
apologize, beg forgiveness, and swear to never do it again.

"Mom, I'm sorry." She did not want to hurt them. "I'll never do it again, I swear." She did not know what else to say.

"Yes you will," mom replied between sobs. She knew that, obviously, this was not the first time her little baby
had transformed himself. With all the trouble he had gone to to look as beautiful and completely feminine
as he did standing before her, she knew that tonight would not be the last. No Erica was doing too convincing
of a job at appearing as a girl to convince her it was a one time thing. And if she were to be honest
with herself, she knew she didn't really want it to be the last time either. Having had to have a complete
hysterectomy after giving birth to Eric, she had always wished she could have another child, a daughter she
could take shopping and buy all kinds of pretty, feminine things for, and she had not kept that a secret from Eric.

"Mom, I'm real sorry. I SWEAR, I'll never do it again."

Erica's mom got control of her emotions. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

"We're not angry with you, honey," his dad stated.

"But, Dad you've got to be disappointed. I mean what parent wouldn't be, especially a father." Erica said,
because that was the way she felt. Her mother reached out and hugged her and her Dad joined in, holding them
both, pulling them into a nice, warm lingering embrace, tightly aginst his chest. Once her father had released
the embrace and given his child a sweet kiss on her forehead, he stretched, and stated, "I'm going to go to
bed and leave you two to talk." Just before turning to head into the bedroom, he leaned in to give Erica's mom
a kiss on the cheek and whispered in her ear, "Let me know how it goes." Then leaning over toward Erica he gave
his child another kiss,this time a soft peck on the cheek then said, "It's going to be alright, dear. Goodnight,

Erica heard her father's words, goodnight girls. That was a word she had long dreamed of hearing her dad say in
reference to her.

"Come, honey, let's have a seat on the couch. I have so much I want to know. By the way, what name have you
chosen?", her mom asked as she took her son by the hand and led him to the loveseat across the room. As she took
a seat she noticed how naturally Erica reached and smoothed the back of her dress, so as not to wrinkle it as
she sat down on the edge of the couch, back straight,knees together, legs crossed at the ankles, one hand on top
of the other; resting on her lap.

"Sweetheart, when I was pregnant with you we decided we didn't want to know if we were having a boy or girl until you were
born, so I had 2 names picked out, Eric, and Erica."

"I know, mom. You have told me several times before. That's WHY I chose . . . Erica."

"Ok,...So, Erica... how about you start by telling tell me all about the prom?"

The End?
Erica's Beginning
xxxsabrynaxxx xxxsabrynaxxx
13 Responses Oct 30, 2010

A very tender and touching story. You have great potential as a writer. It is often said that most authors first story is somewhat autobiographical. Did anything like this ever happen to you? Were you writing from your own experience? I agree with the other comments about concern for Rachel, but that bit of mystery helped to hold my interest in your story.

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I think that that was an awesome story and I wish that things would have been able to have gone like that for me if I would have told My parents. My mom would have understood but my dad definitely would not have understood my feelings that I should have been a girl.

First off it's very, very good. You have a lot of promise as a writer. The lead in was good, I was hooked very quickly. We don't get to meet Rachel however, it would be good I think if she was in the room with the parents. Odd she would not be around to see the parents reaction. Also I think the mother would ask how this all began, not just about the prom. I'm guessing that Rachel would have been 'Eric's' date? A few loose ends to tie, but all in all its much better than some stories I've read on the various TG story sites. Keep writing!!

I think that it was an excellent story. And it would really be nice if all parents were as understanding about this stuff as Erica's were. And i really wish that could of been me and that I had a friend like Rachel. Excellent Story.

You are very talented. What you do with that talent will determine your path as a writer. That means, carefully select what you read. If you read only popular and superficial material, your own writing will follow suit. But if you always read the best of the best, you will be a special writer indeed.<br />
<br />
Good luck.

I loved this story, it was so beautiful. I wish I could have had a friend like Rachel when I was a teenager. Thank you, you write very well.

i like it, however i find the ending doesen't make much sense since i find it implausible that the mother would ask <br />
"Ok,...So, Erica... how about you start by telling tell me all about the prom?"<br />
<br />
i think that it would be more plausible if she was to say something about her being transgendered, since i imagine that would be very much on her mind.<br />
<br />
other than that this is probably the best short story i have ever read =]

Although I understand your position, In my own case when I told my mother about my need to change genders, she responded that she had expected this call for several years now what had taken me so long. I had the same dumb founded response, so much fear and anticipation of abandonment was washed away in that one brief moment. The other hurdle was coming out to my employer and closest 8 fellow employees in the past 4 months. With no regrets for the 7 young adults now grown into self supporting individuals I stepped down the path I am on today.


wow that was good... i wish things like that would happen for me... yes you do have the ability to be a righter...

Hey there. I quite liked it! The story was handled delicately with a deft touch. I felt Erica's fragility and the turmoil inside. The little details such as the outfits and accessories added something personal and set a sweet, dark mood. I don't really have any criticism but for the sake of adding something constructive, I would have put an emotional climax in around the time of the embrace. A flood or welling up of emotion that marked the significance of unconditional love. It might happen as the story progresses but since it was cut off, I don't know how it goes. :D

I want to hear more indepth discussion of the story other than just "it was good" Please???

What a wonderful story and much scope for more. I too wish that things had been this way for me. I look forward to reading more of your stories.

what a lovely story, i wish it were true and that it had happened to me