I Don't Need To Eat

I usually do eat when i'm hungry because well, that's just what you do. You eat when you're hungry.  But there are just some of those days where you are hungry but you just don't want to eat or you tell yourself that you won't eat. This happens to me a lot. I tell myself not to eat because of the fear of getting fat.  I know I should eat when I'm hungry, but I don't need to because I'm already fat enough. And I hate myself for that. 

I hate myself with every bite. I hate that I keep eating when I'm not hungry. Now, I keep telling myself that I don't need to eat.
And I'm right. I don't need to eat. Because I'm already fat enough.

What I do need to do is lose 3-5 pounds and then I might finally be happy with myself.
WhiteSparrow WhiteSparrow
18-21, F
5 Responses Dec 30, 2010

I feel the exact same way Whitesparrow. I'm dealing with the same thing, only I need to lose like 30-40 pounds to be happy. AND I KNOW, I KNOW, people have said that's not what makes a person happy. But hell! When you've been overweight all your life and it's held you back from so much, you KNOW that being more comfortable with your body will help you feel better.

i have this to at first i thought it was anorexia but then i found out that i was lacking in some vitamin and i had a virus. i am here if u want to talk to me.

Hello snowy174, what vitamin were you lacking and how did you get tested for this?

I can definitely relate to how you feel because I used to see myself in the same light at a normal weight. What I eventually learned was that the probably actually wasn't my weight, it was my self perception and that I overlooked other good qualities about myself and ba<x>sed nearly my entire self esteem on weight. <br />
Anyway, hope you find happiness

Thanks, but the reason I'm not happy with myself and confident is because of my weight.. I'm considered "normal weight" for my height and age, but I don't see it. I see myself as fatter than I want to be and fatter than I should be.

I've learned the hard way, that pounds do not determine happiness,or if they do that happiness is fleeting. Happiness is not a number on the scale or a size of clothing. Happiness is how comfortable you feel in your own skin. Happiness is how confident you feel about yourself. It can happen at any weight. I hope you find and enjoy this kind of happiness. As for weight, I recommend aiming for a healthy range (if you're not there already) and accepting yourself in the mean time.<br />
<br />
When I lost 4 pounds and reached my goal weight, I was only happy for a little bit and then I set a new goal weight and quickly became dissatisfied again, and that process repeated. Even when I became thin, I wasn't satisfied and was perhaps more miserable than I was before.