Get Me Out Of Here

I'm very tired at this point in my life. Recent changes have made me want to drop everything and start over again. Im tired of doing things right all the time and getting nowhere, and the few times I make mistakes I get punished severely. I'm tired of having to struggle to get on my feet, never being able to get on my own and take care of myself. I'm tired of living at home like a child. I've done enough years of that. I'm tired of having to sit in a hard uncomfortable desk while listening to someone talk and talk for hours at a time. I'm tired of waiting to find my soulmate, while being in other unfulfilling relationships. Tired of hearing other people tell me that their life is normal, or going great, or see them get on day by day, and not being able to identify with them. I feel empty, defeated, and unmotivated. I dont think I can keep running in place anymore. I want to run away, right out of my life.
endofseptember endofseptember
26-30, F
2 Responses Aug 9, 2010

yea I use to feel that way and sometimes I relaps but I started reading the bible years ago and it works I'm not a church goer or do I shove my beliefs down anyone's throat my relationship with God is a personal one, but when I feel worse for the wear, I find comfort there in my bible it works and I believe it's the schlematic to life.

thanks omniel, I've tried some changes but nothing ever gets me to where I want to be. thats why I wish I could make bigger changes, but these might not always be considered "wise" so it keeps me where I am. People will look at me and say I'm doing fine, I'm doing all I can, but for some reason it isnt enough for me, or its not what I want. A little while ago I was close to where I wanted to be, for the first time in my life, then I lost it all. Lost my job and am broke during a dead economy. Having little or no hope of anything getting better here. I feel dead, I want to leave this dead life behind and find a new one.