And Sometimes I Just Wish I Was Dead.

I have no sad story of a horrid childhood, so I have no idea why I turned out the way I did. Its easy to blame others when searching for the truth. Its easy to believe you're this way because of what someone said a long time ago. All I know is that I hate myself more than humanly possible, and more than anybody knows. I'm tired of pretending and I'm tired of lying all the time. I've tried to leave... I've tried more times then I can count. I just wanted to escape, run away. Be someone I wished I was. Be someone I wished I could be. I let it out on myself and I didn't care for the consequences. I didn't care that it hurt and I didn't care that it stopped hurting. It was an easy way to feel something that I wanted, craved. I liked hurting myself. I liked what it looked like. I liked the feeling of my blood leaving my body. I liked the feeling the life leave my body. I don't want to be here anymore. I want to die.
thegirlthatgotaway thegirlthatgotaway
18-21
Sep 8, 2012