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I Spanked My Daughter For The 1st Time

My eldest daughter A is twelve and has just begun to enter that stage of life where she back chats her Papa and I, among other things. She is the eldest of our seven children and her behaviour is having an effect on her young siblings (aged 13m-9).
As a rule, we are quite easy going as parents, and as a whole are children are well rounded, honest, truthful and lovable children. Because of this, "corner-time" and/or taking away a privelage has worked for us.
Until recently.

My husband and I had allowed A to attend a party of a school friend, on condition she was home by 6:30pm for Family Time. She agreed to this. At around 6:25pm, I went to the porch to look out for her, as is my norm. The school friends home is only a three minute walk away, so I expected her home soon. Ten minutes later, she wasn't home. I thought that perhaps she'd just lost track of time, so I called the mother of her friend.

Her friend's mother informed me that A and a few other girls had walked to a park that was 15 MINUTES AWAY! I was furious. My daughter knew she had to be home by 6:30, not to mention that she had not even contacted me to ask if she could go to the park in the first place. I was also furious with the mother of her friend, who seemed to think there was no problem!

Still seathing, I left my six yonger children with my parents and drove to the park to pick her up. On the way, I phoned my husband and told him what happened. On arrival, the look on my face must have told her how angry I was, because she grew pale. Once I got her in the car and we were on our way home, I informed her how angry and upset me and her Papa were and then informed her she would recieve a hearty spanking once we got home.

I'm not sure A really belived me, as when she opened the front door, she went flying into the living room, and started to tell everyone about it. Walking into the living room, a few moments later, I calmly asked her to remove herself from the family and go to the study. Our children know that being asked to enter their father's study means punishment of some sort.

A was sitting in a chair when I entered. I carefully explained to her that she had misbehaved and how she had misbehaved. I then told her that her punishment was a spanking and that I required her over my knee. By the time she was settled on my knee, she was weeping silently, as she had never had a spanking from either parent.

I spanked (with hand) for 2-3 minutes over her underwear and then removed her panties completely and continued for another 3-4 minutes. Even with her panties on, she was wailing hysterically. After the spanking was complete, I told her that she was to have a shower and then go to bed. She obeyed (obediently, I may add) and so far, we've had no further trouble.
deleted deleted 26-30 16 Responses Jun 10, 2012

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GOOD MUM YOU SEE NEED IT

Every time I got spanked - and I got plenty over my mom's knee -I got my panties pulled down and it was the paddle (or if we were out, the hairbrush in her purse). The good thing about this was Mom put the paddle away for good once I was 11.

I think that instead of anger, you need to teach yourself humor over every single teenager behavior that fails to meet the mark. Teens love the argument of the absurd. I'll give you an example. If she was my daughter, (and I used this one on my own daughter)... I would ask her, 'Mary, do you want a good relationship with your (in my case) dad?' She'll say yes or why. I then say, 'in order for me to trust you, you have to obey the rules (home at 4:30).' I then say, 'when you didn't come home, I'm confused. Should I worry about you or not (said with a smile on your face). If you tell me not to, our relationship will not be as good because good moms/dads follow rules and need their kids to follow rules.' 'If I worry about you, that worrying will take 5 years off my life!!!' (Again, said with a smile and a glint of respect in your eye for them.)

The kicker to all the above? Put the burden of following rules on their shoulders and keep it there. If they blow through the rules, remind them that things aren't as good because they don't care about us. You have to continually let them decide on how to grow up while we decide how we want them to grow up. If your rules are reasonable for their age, then you will get compliance and good will and watch them grow up respectfully and well rounded.

Kids will fail at growing up. Our role is to be loving mentors and then cheerleaders for them. Eventually they'll outgrow these needs. But, I still believe in helping them see their choices even though my kids are now 32 and 29.

Remember. Smile, have rules but teach them the real consequences to not obeying the rules.

Very wise words and a great attitude .... Thanks ;-)

I feel that if a child deserves a spanking then they should get a spanking. I had my share of over the knee bare bottom spankings. Doing a spaning for 6 minutes is uncalled for. A spanking should be 2 times the age of the child so if the child is 12 then 24 spankings.

i think thats bull crap im 22 never been spanked in my entire life my parents didnt have the guts plus they wernt my parents i was adopted but they cant handle me .. i used to bunk off school , swear at the teachers , swear at them and not once did they spank me they would ground me but i used to just climb out the window ! haha .. as they call me im a brat but i always get what i want everytime !!! :)

That reminds me last weekend my daughter had went to a friends house and she had to be home by 9:45 and I went outside to wait for her to come home she came home at 11:45 she knew she was in trouble and that she was gunna get a very hard spanked over my knee I told her to go wait in her room and when I got their I spanked her over her panties for 10 minutes and she was already in tears then I pulled down her panties and spanked her bare bottom for another 10 minutes she won't do that again for awhile!

Her bare butt should used the paddle. Yes she would of learned to tell time.

A bare butt spanking for the first time. It seemed to work on her behavior,if it happens again will you spank her harder?

You spanked your 12 year old daughters bare butt for 6 minutes!? That is excessive and inexcusable. 12 is way to old and there is no reason to take her pants or underwear off. That is so degrading and humilitaing. Especially at 12. You should be ashamed.

I actually agree with you, once a child enters adolescence you shouldn't spank at all. Even when they're younger you should be more circumspect...if you love them.

Ha! Good luck as she gets a little older!!! (The fun is only just starting!!!)

I think bare bottom spanking is ok only by the mother

I got 5 kids all spanked once a day at the age of 2.

Omg youre a wonderful mom..children starting at 2-3 should have a spanking everyday even if they did nothing wrong.everyone in the family should participate in the maintenance spankings so they grow up knowing the proper way to behave in the family.

You spank a child when they've obedient and respectful, and you have a child who has no reason to obey you, and even less reason to respect you...and every reason in the world to hate you.

I believe in spanking as discipline for children. But, above all else, it must be fair. Punishing a child who has done no wrong only teaches them that it's all right to treat people unjustly.

wow 7 kids and never given a spanking befor you must have alot of patience <br />
i bet she wont cross u again

wow ... my kids were spanked by 6 but then again I'm not so easy going

More than likely, the extracurricular trip to the park was the straw that broke the camel's back. At age 12, your daughter's behavior was a probably a spanking waiting to happen. <br />
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Several months ago, I had an opportunity to council a 12-year-old about her behavior. At the time, she and her step-mother were trying to work out their problems. It wasn't anything major; it was just typical preteen behaviors. <br />
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After getting permission from the girl's biological father, the step-mom initiated a conversation with her now charge about the possibility of spanking. Like your daughter, the girl had never been spanked. She asked my what I thought about it. I explained the pros and cons, and suggested she continue the dialogue with her step-mom - with whom she was on a first name basis.<br />
<br />
A few days later the girl reported that she and her step-mom had agreed that the next time she engaged in a particular behavior, she would get a panties-down spanking over her step-mom's knee.<br />
<br />
A few days after that, the girl reported that, although the had tried to be good, there had been a lapse in her behavior for which she was spanked as promised. The girl said, although her step-mom used her hand, it still hurt worse than anything she had ever experienced in her life! At the same time, she said it make ther much more careful about how she behaved.

I thaught it was harsh. She was just having some fun with friends and she didnt know her mistake. How can you punish someone for their misunderstanding. I usually will spank if there is outright defiance for exm after being told not to do something several times, or if i see severe malice.

You did great. <br />
And your daughter behaved very impressive for the first spanking, you must have raised her well.