My Story

I am a 20 year old female.. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and 7 months and living together for almost a year. He has a 5 year old son that lives with us. At first everything was okay, but as time goes by his son and I don't get along so good. He has no manners, his dad doesn't discipline him and he always gets what he wants. Some days we are good and others he purposely is trying to **** me off. When he miss behaves I give him time outs because I believe he shouldn't get away with things. I refuse to spank him as I feel uncomfortable with it. I love my boyfriend with all my heart but being young and helping someone raise a kid that's already 5 is a lot to deal with. I often get asked by friends and family how I can do it, I just tell them take it one day at a time and they all say they couldn't do it. Nobody I know that is my age deals with the same things that I do so I don't really have anyone to talk to, no one that can relate to me and give me advice. I find it stressful when you don't have anyone to talk to about it.

The child's mom is... I like to say the word useless or ridiculous for the fact that she can't be bothered to be in his life. I have spent more money on him then his own mother has. In the time that I have been dating my boyfriend she has maybe seen her kid a total of 2 or 3 times. She's never gotten him a birthday gift or Christmas gifts, she doesn't even call him, nothing. I guess she also has a handful of other kids and most are in foster care.

Lately we have been talking about buying a house together and also having a child. I do want a child one day, so I guess we will see what happens in the future..
vamp20 vamp20
18-21, F
2 Responses Mar 22, 2012

Talk to him and let him know that his behavior isn't right since you are his mother even tho you didn't birth him you have to set the examples since his dad won't do it.he needs that.I think your doing a wonderful thing taking on a child that's not yours by blood at your age.but remember his mom left him that has to be so hard for this little boy.hang in there your doing the right thing.

I am 28 years old and my boyfriend has a daughter 8 years old.<br />
She visits as every other weekend, when she cames home every is upside down.<br />
That child has no boundaries,valious or manners taken from her mother. She knows nothing about self hygiene, does nothing in the house only plays in the ps or watches tv.<br />
When she is at home i never stop cleaning the house and at the end of the weekend i am exosted.<br />
Her father does nothing, he thinks that this is normal for an 8 year old child.<br />
We are thinking of having a baby of our own and when SD learned about that she said that we can because the dog will eat of the baby when we sleap.<br />
Many of the things that SD does or say are directed from her mother because she doesn't want BD to get married again ever not only with me, due to the money and houses that he has.<br />
You tell me now can i have a child of my own and go to sleep with SD in the house, i am afraid of leaving a baby with that child a go to sleep.<br />
Moreover, i don't have the same valious with that child and i want to give them to my kid, but what happens when SD cames, will all the work i would have done by spoiled because its just easier?<br />
So, you are not alone there are many many stories like mine or yours out there.<br />
I am not a native English speaker so dont mind my English.

oh my, thats scary! We are actually trying to have a baby, and his son is ok with it. ( my boyfriend asked him).. Does she not get enough attention from her mom? or why does she act like that? she's 8 years old she should be excited about having a little sibling.. or is she afraid she'd lose the attention of her dad?. I am so glad I don't have to deal with my S.S's mother, it would just make my relationship harder.