My Heart Breaks Every Time

Me and my ex have been split up for a while now. we was only together for about 3 years and 4 months but they were the most amazing and loving years of my life. we had our arguments every now and then but we had a really good relationship. One day out the blue i was told it wasnt working anymore and that we have run our course. i didnt feel that way obviously and wanted to sort something out but he said it was truelly over. I got no full explanation and it was like his love for me had been turned off like a light switch over night. one day he loved me, the next he didnt. it breaks my heart everytime i say to myself 'he doesnt love u anymore'. it doesnt feel right loving someone who doesnt love you back. I know i am going to love this guy for the rest of my life because that is what real love is, so what was his love for me? fake? i know i'm probably tormenting myself but i cant help it. My heart feels like it gets a new hole everyday. i just want to stop loving him and move on and be truelly happy again. we talk every now and again and he has told me sometimes that he sits and thinks about me. it hurts so so much. i haven't really got anyone to talk to either and help me through this as my best friend has moved out of the country for a year. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

SammyCymru SammyCymru
22-25, F
5 Responses Mar 22, 2009

I agree with pinkkennel.

You must do things in life to get something back plus it will take your mind off things.

Please don't think that the lights have switched off in your life forever. It will take time but you will meet somebody you enjoy being with even if you are not in love with the person.

i was thinking of getting a lobotomy....care to join me?

eventually you'll find yourself numbed to it... i read once that after a big breakup like that, you need to make a big change in your life. like a move, or redo your entire apartment/house... get a new job. something big, so your life isn't just like it used to be, minus him. i guess it depends on where you are in your life, whether or not that's possible...<br />
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But I'm a firm believer in "Everything happens for a reason." Him leaving you has made you stronger already... you have one more experience added to your life. It will be useful at some point in your life, it will help you get through something that you couldn't have gotten through without it... I can guarantee it.

Thank you that was a nice and helpful reply. I joined the gym a couple days ago which has helped take my mind off things and gave me somewhere to go when i find sitting in by myself too much. I wish i knew how long it took for a heart to heal, or there was some cure. It's just when your so upset you can never see the end.

I feel for you and I was there not long ago. The best I can offer is to find things to keep you from dwelling and analyzing the past. To help yourself move forward, take a class or involve yourself in other activities being with or finding new friends and supportive, loving people.<br />
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It will take time but if you're willing to move on, it will happen slowly but surely. It will be just one more experience that will make you a stronger and more beautiful person. Hang in there!