I Still Love Him, And He Still Loves Me.

we met and dated in middle school. i was the shy and awkward new girl (i had just moved from Hawaii to Alabama) and he was the cute class clown that everyone loved. we sat next to eachother in science and became super fast friends. a few months later he asked me out and, honestly, i just didnt like him in that way at the time. he asked me out a few more times and each time i said no. then we went on a class trip to NYC and we were alone one night in our hotel and we were having a deep conversation about life after death, God and heaven, etc. and then.. i dont know. something just clicked inside of me and right there in that very moment i feelings toward my friend were completely different. my body then went into autopilot and i starting doing things before thinking about it. i slipped my hand into his, turned toward him, and started talking at light speed. i said "listen, i think i like you more than a friend. like i dont know, just all of the sudden i feel a lot different. i dont know maybe it was the conversation or that were in new york or something but i definetly feel different. but i know ive been a ***** to you with saying no every time you---" then he stood up, still holding my hand so i stopped talking. then he said "well, its about time." grabbed my face, and kissed me, right there in the hotel lobby. it was the best feeling ever. so after that we dated until mid-summer. he moved away to Maine in July so we had to break up. i was heartbroken all summer until i started high school. then i met a few more guys and completely forgot about him. then i graduated and moved to California for college. i was all by myself the whole summer and i felt really lonely. i decided to call him. i hadnt talked to him in over 3 years but i was really in need of a friend. it was a little bit awkward at first but soon we became fast friends again. he told me that he hadnt dated anyone since me and that he still thinks about me. then i got that really weird and sudden feeling all over again. so thats how i know i still love him. i dream about kissing him and visiting him and starting a life together. we still talk and i hope one day this dream becomes reality. :)
Boboboyyyy Boboboyyyy
26-30, F
1 Response Jul 23, 2013

I still love my first love and it has been 12 years...life is cruel most of the time.. she is now married and probably has a happy life. In my heart I am still waiting for her and dreaming one day will be together and live happily ever after, but that will never happen. So my advice, just do what your hearts tells you and Good luck with your dream :).