My Diaper Story
My story starts out when I was 17, I was always a fat kid so you can imagine how happy I was when I started losing weight. I was 215 lbs at the end of May in my junior year of high school. The summer to follow ended up being a blessing and a curse to me. I started losing massive amounts of weight even though my diet didn't really change. I was soo happy that I didn't even care what the reasons were, and even though I figured something was wrong I didn't want to get help and end up being fat again. As the summer went on I had lost a lot of weight, I was down to 149 lbs, but I also had to go to the bathroom a lot, and I was always thirsty and sleeping. Then I started wetting the bed, it was hard to hide always flipping my mattress and putting a fan on during the day to dry it. I knew one thing though I wasn't going back to being fat, and getting picked on and teased, not to mention my last name is horrible so I might as well have paited a target on me. Also beautiful girls started liking me and there was no way I was giving that up, since I had never had a girlfriend up to this point. Near the end of the summer we had a family trip planned to Nebraska, and by this time I almost couldn't walk I had to climb stairs on my hands and knees cause my leg muscles couldn't pull my 149 lb body up the stairs on their own. My parents were worried by this time but I always made up excuses and hid most of the stuff from them. We headed out for a 1800 mile road trip and I literally had to stop every 50 miles to pee. My step dad was not going to have this the whole way to Nebraska so I was forced to hold it as long as I could which turned out to be about 100 miles and I was in complete agony trying to hold it. The last leg of the trip was like 175 miles and my step dad was pissed by this point cause we had made such horrible time. He told me we weren't stopping again till we got there, and when we got back home I was going to the doctor. That last 175 miles was pure hell, I held it in for so long that when we stopped in Nebraska my bladder was so full and i was in soo much pain that I couldn't move. My mom helped me out of the van but as I started to walk I felt something that I can only describe as tearing, and I completely wet my pants in front of the rest stop. If you think that oh well at least you didn't have to be in soo much pain anymore you'd be wrong. The pain in relieving myself was just as bad as holding it and on top of that I pissed my pants, my step dad was super angry and my mom was almost crying she was so concerned for me. When we got back from Nebraska it was straight to the doctor for me. My doctor thought I had MS by the way I looked since the last time he saw me, but after the blood tests he told me it was diabetes and that I needed to be put on insulin immediately. He asked me how long this was going on and I told him honestly. I told him about the bedwetting and wetting my pants in Nebraska and I asked him if it would get better. He said probably but he didn't want to give me any false hope. He said that I had been in a state of KEYTOACIDOSIS for more than three months. For those of you who don't know KEYTOACIDOSIS is where your body can't produce the carbs you are eating so your body basically wastes them and feeds of your body fat and when there's no fat left eventually your muscles. KEYTONES are poisons you're body produces from high blood sugar and my body had been full of them for more than three months. Immediately after my doctor's appointment I had to go to the diabetes center and learn to take my blood sugars and give myself a shot. Normal blood sugar is 80-120, my first blood sugar reading was 756. The doctor told me I should be in a diabetic coma right now. I started taking my insulin and I had soo much energy I felt that I could've run a marathon if my legs would've worked right. As the weeks went on things got better and I did put on a little weight but I was still 175-180 lbs which I was ok with, and the bedwetting had gone down from every night to 3 or 4 times a week but new to me was a daytime accident about once a week. I called my doctor and asked him what my options were, and he said that I probably have some nerve damage from the keytones and possibly some muscle damage for holding it to such extremes as I did. He told me I basically have two options to use a catheder, which involves shoving a straw up my ****....... um **** that, or adult diapers. I was shocked and dismissed both of his recommendations figuring I could just fix it by getting up regularly to go to the bathroom. After 2 months of trying and 4 very embarrassing public accidents I knew that it was impossible so I went out and bought my first pack of diapers. I got in and out of the store as fast as I could and I was sure that everybody in the store had saw what I bought when they hadn't. I brought the diapers home and I decided to put one on right away to see if I could tolerate it. I opened the pack of diapers and pulled one out, unfolded it and situated it underneath myself. From the moment I pulled the front up and taped in place I had the a feeling like I had been missing diapers since my childhood. Not only was it okay that I was in a diaper I actually liked wearing it, I knew right there and then this was the begining of a new life style for me. My girlfriend on the other hand was less than excited and ended up dumping me because of the diapers, even though I needed them. It took me six years to try and date after her, I loved her and I was afraid to date because I didn't want anyone to leave me because I had to wear diapers. I have since become a lot more confident about myself and have had a descent amount of girlfriends in spite of the diaper wearing. Some of them have even gone as far as to wear them with me a couple of times. Because of my condition I'm never going to be out of diapers for the rest of my life, and that's okay I wouldn't have it any other way.