A Conflict Of Interests

I have always wanted to achieve great things. I have lofty goals of changing the world, leaving my mark, and living a life of wild abandon. I want to see, do, learn, and experience everything I possibly can. I dream of really, truly being alive . . . not just surviving.
But at the same time, I feel as though I'm not going anywhere. I have no life skills and even basic responsibilities leave me feeling overwhelmed and incapable. It's like I am unable to handle life. I have no solid plans for the future, only dreams, and it seems like everything is standing in the way.
I have so many dreams and so much potential, but I'm such a loser at the same time. Sometimes, I think I'd be better off dead, but I want to live too much to bring death to fruition.

I am nothing but I need to be something so badly that it is almost killing me.
AttackedByMonsters AttackedByMonsters
18-21, F
Dec 16, 2012