I Don't Think It's Uncommon At All...

I've had body image issues since middle school, when I began to gain weight. I started the habit of compulsive binge eating as a coping and defense mechanism when I was a pre-teen, but weight and body image didn't register on my radar until puberty. It's then that my metabolism stopped being quick like when I was small and all the extra food I would eat during my almost daily binges started staying in the form of excess fat. Compulsive binge eating disorder on top of a poor self-image left me with low self esteem for years. I had friends, I even had a few boyfriends, but I could never shake the bad body image. I can't even say it was because of models or magazines, always having been something of a hippie I never subscribed to that stuff. I just felt so utterly ashamed of my binge eating but didn't know how to stop it, and my body image had me seeing a morbidly obese girl in the mirror. Looking back at photos, I was a little chubby but nothing out of the range of slightly overweight. It wasn't until after high school that I put on a dangerous amount of weight. I'm now 27 and I still have issues with it, but it's getting better. What's helped the most is surrounding myself with supportive people in my life, as well as finding deeper meaning and purpose by going after things I'm passionate about. Having interests that have nothing to do with size, weight, and appearance helps a great deal. I'm still overweight now, and yes I would be happier if I could take off about 30 more pounds, but for the first time in my life I'm not obsessing over the numbers, and I'm not worried about becoming *thin.* I'd like to have better athletic performance and more stamina in general, so I know that eating balanced and healthy on top of being active are things I need to do to feel better. I have some back problems that I know will be alleviated by losing said 30 lbs. These days it's not so much about appearance and vanity and more about health. I still have bad days, but I know I'm a good person, and it doesn't matter that I don't have a statuesque, svelte figure. There are more meaningful things to chase after in life.  Not everyone gets to be the prettiest girl, but we can all shine and have unique attributes about ourselves that other people see and appreciate in us.
somegirl12345678 somegirl12345678
2 Responses Jul 17, 2010

"fit is about what you can do, not what you look like"-fitnessblender (they are awesome, look it up!) "You are all beautiful in your own unique way"-Taylor Swift :)

nicely said! totally agree with what u said. we r all beautiful in our own way