Not All the Time Anymore

Whilst growing up, the pressure on women is very hard, when it comes to their image. This pressure is not, given by men, even thought that is the main excuse used. The real reason behind all of the pressure and doubt, are other women. 

Western women are bombarded every day with unhealthy images of what is supposed to be beautiful. Men often are pulled into this as an excuse, and I've heard girls say 'But guys like that kind of girl..' 'I am not his type' 'Guys like skinny girls'. 
What men like has nothing to do with all of this. Women's desire to control does. Women are complicated, wonderful beings. I love being a woman. 

But I am constantly confronted with situations of jealousy and competition to be the best looking between women. What women have to understand is that there is no 'best looking'. Attraction is entirely subjective. You can be the skinniest, blondest woman around, but the guy you want might be attracted by a short black woman with a large bottom. Does that make you unattractive? No. One simply has to learn to pursue mutual attraction. Unfortunately this is not simple, but there's always time to learn.

How does this relate with my struggles? It does. If I had been born in the 1950's I'd probably be a model. Okay I'm kidding, but I realize my figure is exactly what was deemed sexy back then. Of course, I am not prefect. But who is really?
Is there some high being whose features we all have to compare to? 

Fashion unfortunately is another thing that doesn't help. Fat women, in the 17th century, where the top.
Now, it's in to look boyish and androgynous, with long arms and legs. Small breasts are in. Skinny is good. 
So obviously I am not 'in'. I am curvy, big breasted and short. I don't look like one of those girly girls who wear jeans and nice t-shirts. I can't wear most of the clothes that are fashionable, because they don't suit my figure. It's kind of frustrating going shopping. But when I wear clothes that actually suit me, they obviously are vintage, vintage inspired or just plain different. 
Obviously I don't fit in with other girls. It's a pain sometimes. 
But what I don't get in fitting in, and being plain, I get in being noticed for who I am, uniquely related to me.
To arrive to a point where I can accept how I look, I had to go through a lot of doubt. I used to want to be like the other girls so much, especially around the age of 16. Even though not a lot of time has passed, two years have been a lot of time to mature and realize I should embrace who I am, even solely for the fact that there will never be another one like me. You are born only once, and one should not waste life trying to be like others or fit in.
Of course though, the social pressure and conditioning for me to want to be a twig, sometimes is too strong to handle and I do get doubtful and depressed. It's tough being different, but there is nothing better than being appreciated for who you are, not who you try to be.

That being said, women should be free to be however they want to be. I think it's really admirable in a woman to fully accept her body, (fat, thin or curvy), no matter what society dictates she should look like.

LittleMonroe LittleMonroe
18-21, F
2 Responses Mar 8, 2009

".... women should be free to be however they want to be. I think it's really admirable in a woman to fully accept her body, (fat, thin or curvy), no matter what society dictates she should look like..."<br />
<br />
I couldn't agree more with these statements. However, the process to fully accept her own body for women is sometimes not that easy since society pressure is awfully big.

thank you for sharing this story!<br />
being a teen I feel so bombarded with what's considered "hot",beautiful and all that,and I find it overwhelming and cant help but have unrealistic images in my head about beauty,like those women on magazines and all that. my "thing" is I know I have a beautiful body and all im slender small boobs(still a bit insecure about that lol) the only thing I wish i could change was my face ive been subjected to,looking at actresses on movies and barbie that my image of a beautiful face is a bit distorted.<br />
how do you deal with all this,societies distorted image of beauty?